This Is How Needy People Get Your Energy and How to Stop the Cycle

Guilt plagues us. And it's most often not guilt for doing something horribly wrong, but more of a sense of guilt for merely being. It's an aching, nagging feeling that you're just not enough. You didn't love someone enough, you didn't take good enough care of them. You're just not enough. You can't be enough for all the people and all the things around you.

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And it's no wonder. Guilt drains. It's like a demon inside of you that saps your energy. So not only are you not able to take care of what's going on around you, you can't take care of yourself. Your energy is totally drained, and you don't even have enough energy to live at a healthy baseline, much less extraordinary.

I've seen people who have had loved ones die, and the aching and sadness that they feel is not even so much at missing that person, but at their own inadequacy for that person. They could never love them enough or call them enough or give them enough.

This is known to be a very Catholic thing. Catholic guilt. You can never love your mother enough, you just are never enough. You must be a constant giving machine - there for whatever people need from you. This is rampant among women.

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This way of being is very close to me, and I must say that I traveled down this road as well. This is pervasive in the women of my family.

What you get is a circular energy drain that's run by guilt. This one doesn't feel like enough and needs more, and through guilt drains this one. And because this one doesn't have enough, she does it to that one. I used to be that one, and I broke the circle.

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When I was a never-ending giving machine for all the energy and love that my loved ones wanted, I became very sick. And I had no choice but to give it all up completely. My body and my inner being demanded it.

There's nothing inappropriate about you. You are so appropriate and right. Please take the utmost care of yourself first, and then give from a place that there is so much love bursting forth in you that it shines outward. It is never a giving from a finite resource. Please don't ever give from this place.

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Please know that others are responsible for themselves, no matter how much you love them and you want them to be full. It's time to take away the nipple and let them start feeding themselves. They don't know how to, but if a child is always carried and is never put on the floor, they will never try to walk. You don't do a two-year-old child any favors by carrying it everywhere you go. In fact, it's negligent and abusive.

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There are many out there who themselves don't feel like enough, and they seek from others. If you're being drained by people, chances are, you're also draining others whether you know it or not. You have to get it somehow, and there's a very good chance you never learned how to get it yourself. Go to the source. Start a morning practice to take care of yourself. Start building up enough energy in yourself so that you can be calm and centered, and stop feeding that guilt monster.

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You're not to blame for anyone's place in life. If you have harmed someone in the past, please forgive yourself. The past is dead. After seven years all the cells of your body are brand new. You are literally not the same person you once were. You're only what you choose to continue and bring into your present. Now is fresh. You can do whatever you like with it.

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Guilt is a life force drainer. It's a tool of needy and clingy energy vampires. Stop buying into this story. Be the teller of your own story. Claim yourself and your story and be strong and firm in it, and know that you're enough. Begin your morning practice so that you can be enough for yourself and get at least to baseline survival energy again. If you've lived like this, you need some selfish healing time.

You have to be enough for yourself first. Better yet, you need to overflow with yourself.

Here's a simple and quick daily exercise to help you rebuild your own energy center and stay strong in yourself:

Every day I draw a card from one of my tarot decks to help my Steemians be successful, happy, well, on purpose, and their best selves. This post was inspired by drawing from the Osho Zen Tarot deck.

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