We admitted we were powerless over Frank Bacon

One morning while watching hour three of the Crowdsource The Spoof Port of Charlotte livestream investigation saga, day 12, I realized that my life had become unmanageable. Jn Gman had just requested that we call the Port of Charlotte with credible information regarding the threat of a dirty bomb on the Maersk Memphis. I was so wrapped up in the idea of credible threats, actionable intelligence, 3D stereoscopic lenses and Tinder dates with women of at least 20 years of age I had lost control of my life.

As I held the phone in my hand, ready to press send,(after J***n had read aloud the phone number of the Port Authority), I thought of @FrankBacon and that epic voicemail. What would Frank do in this situation? Well, I figured @FrankBacon would probably not call the PA, and instead write this all up in some form of Sci-Fi ridiculousness. Or maybe call JG and leave another really clever voicemail. Either way, @FrankBacon already knew what was on my mind.

Frank knew and Frank was ready to direct my thinking.

At that moment, I decided my life was unmanageable. I couldn't go on for days at a time without sleep, watching up to 16 hours of useless live streams from Clownsource, waiting for those notifications, hanging onto useless teases, convinced that THE NEXT one would be worth it. I wasn't gonna miss a single word for fear that the video would be deleted because George had doxxed another confidential source or got wine drunk and called Kim.Com a fucking fraud. I knew that I had to turn my life and my will over to a power greater than myself, and for me, that power was @FrankBacon.

Half measures availed me nothing. I stood at the turning point. I asked for His protection and care with complete abandon. These are the steps I took to, which are suggested as a program of recovery, after realizing CSTT was a giant waste of time:

1. I admitted I was powerless over Frank Bacon—that my life had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than myself (Frank Bacon) could restore me to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn my will and my life over to the care of Frank Bacon as I understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless memetic inventory of myself, as it related to Frank Bacon.
5. Admitted to Frank Bacon, to myself, and to another human being the exact nature of my wrongs.
6. Was entirely ready to have Frank Bacon remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Frank Bacon to remove my shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had memed and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others, unless directed by Frank Bacon.
10. Continued to take a personal inventory and when I was wrong promptly admitted it so that Frank Bacon could wash away my sins.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve my conscious contact with Frank Bacon as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry the message of Frank Bacon to other Steemians and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Many of us who subscribed to Crowdsource The Spoof exclaimed, “What an order! I can’t go through with it.’’ Do not be discouraged. No former Webb-heads among us have been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. I still watch George and J***n, but through the lens of @Hoaxwars and @SchoolPlay. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.

@FrankBacon (current candidate for Emperor of Steemit) is my Higher Power. CSTT and J***n G*****n no longer hold the power over me that they once did and I have @FrankBacon to thank for that. I humbly ask that you consider casting your vote for @FrankBacon and stay tuned for further announcements. And keep coming back. Remember, Just for Today you don't have to use CSTT.