Dreams Come True: The Importance of Being Able to Accept Gifts

Five or six years ago, while on a flight home from yet another business trip, I was reading the in-flight magazine and noticed an article about a special town in Northern Spain: San Sebastián. The magazine article was all about how this was the gourmet capital of Europe, if not the World, and a place that you need to visit at least once. The thought that crossed my mind that day was simple: I want to go there at some point.

Old Habits Die Hard

September 2016. My birthday’s coming up. @sashagenji and I are having breakfast. All of a sudden she brings up the idea of going on a short trip to Spain for my birthday and mentions San Sebastián. My brain starts its usual routine of finding reasons why now is a bad time, but life seems to have its own rules and priorities… The following morning tickets and hotel are booked, so we’re going.

Three days before the flight, doubts start kicking in again. If we don’t go on this trip, I reason, then we can use the time and budget (a significant one, which my wife planned out) for a project that we’ve been meaning to dedicate resources to. “This is your day and we’re going,” my wife replied. I guess we’re going then…

We’re at the airport and all of a sudden Sasha turns around and says: let’s play the Transformation Game! “That sounds interesting,” I think to myself, but not much more than that. This moment, however, was to become a spark that ignited a separate chain of miraculous and beneficial events later on…

Miracles, Signs, and Opportunities

It’s now my birthday and we’re in a fantastic, boutique hotel in the center of San Sebastián, in a luxury suite with a view over the river and surrounding city. Amazingly, the room has its own drop-down screen and ceiling projector. The reason this was particularly amazing was that I had written down the idea of having a home projector rather than a large flat screen TV a few years ago and was wondering what it would be like ever since. And here it was: a first-hand experience, with a superb movie collection to choose from, and in a luxury setting, no less!

The following day we take a lovely walk to explore the city some more, especially the narrow inner streets that have loads of yummy cafés and restaurants. It’s sunny and warm outside. After lunch, we stop at a flower shop, buy a bouquet for Sasha, and carry on. Along the way, we catch a glimpse of a tiny bookshop specializing in spiritual and esoteric literature. We approach and would do you think is looking right at us? The smiling, unmistakable face of Amma on a poster! What’s so special about this? My wife had booked a trip to Milan to see this amazing woman 2 weeks after our return from San Sebastián as well as a stay at Amma’s ashram in India in January, that’s what!

We exchange glances and without needing to say a word – just smiling – enter the shop. A great selection of books and other trinkets, for sure, but nothing really catches our eye to warrant a purchase. Before leaving, however, I suddenly remember my wife’s suggestion at the airport regarding playing the Transformation Game. We can’t find it in the shop and ask the shopkeeper if he knows about it. “Hmm… sounds familiar,” he says to himself and starts tapping away at the keyboard. Within a minute something clicks. “Yes, I remember now! I know someone not far from here who used to facilitate these sessions, but I think they’ve moved away now. Maybe you should search online when you get a chance.” And that’s what we did, but that’s a story for another blog post… 😉

Giving and Receiving

I’m not sure exactly at what point the spontaneous idea crossed our minds to gift the flowers in Sasha’s bouquet. How many many people walk around giving flowers to complete strangers? But it seemed completely “right” for us: it’s my birthday, I’m enjoying the day, and I want to share my joy with others. Why should there be rules for how to spend your birthday? 🎉 Giving is one of the most powerful ways of receiving.

Two waitresses in a corner cafe, a kind street seller, a young girl, a postman, the hotel receptionist: their faces tell a fantastic story. First, a moment of confusion. What’s this all about?! Then a spark of hope and amazement in the eyes. What invariably follows, after telling them that “yes, these are for you” is a wide, natural smile that simply cannot be faked. After this journey of giving, we were left with a reminder that you can receive by giving.

The second realization was how frequently people reject free gifts and joy that is staring them in the face, in fact, more often than not. For every person that accepted our flowers with glee, 2 others rejected them outright, most without saying a word, just turning around and walking away. We can all relate to this. For some reason, society seems to program this response into us at some point: to feel uncomfortable and defensive when being offered a free gift, and some strange pride at rejecting them. Being able to accept gifts easily is, ironically, something that many of us need to learn how to do.

Regardless, the apotheosis and confirmation that we made the right choice came when we met two girls sitting outside a cafe who were singing Happy Birthday to a friend over a video call on their phone. We were at the exact right place, at the exact right time to essentially hear the “Happy Birthday” song being sung on my birthday serendipitously after giving away all those flowers through the city.

Importance of Accepting

It’s evening and we’re sitting in the charming Rekondo restaurant. The food is amazing, sure, but its special something is a 200+ page wine list, one of the biggest in the world. I’m drinking a red wine that’s literally as old as I am. The best is yet to come, however, as my wife slyly grins, reaches into her bag, and hands me a colored envelope. “What’s this?” I ask. A pre-paid debit card with a pretty big spending limit, that’s what; a gift from our friends who know us well enough to gift us money rather than rack their brains trying to figure out a suitable present. 🤣 On the card is enough money to cover pretty much all expenses from the San Sebastián trip. I smile, grateful for this confirmation that sometimes simply accepting gifts paves the way for further magic. You just need to listen to your inner voice. Had I not accepted to go on this trip, I would have missed out on:

• Getting a lead on who to contact regarding facilitation of the Transformation Game, all because of an Amma poster.
• Being able to experience a room projector. Sure, this wasn’t home, or even in the same country, but the Universe gifted me this experience in its own, unique way.
• The lesson learned after (somewhat) worrying about directing our resources elsewhere, only to be met with an almost equal monetary gift from our friends.
• And of course, the opportunity to finally realize the desire that I had for several years after reading that article in an in-flight magazine…

In closing, I’d just like to leave you with an affirmation from @sashagenji 's collection. Maybe it will play a role in your life no less important than the role it played in mine.

P.S. want an affirmation made just for you? Let me or @sashagenji know!