Mini Motivation #101 - Hurting People Hurt Others
Imagine someone had a thorn in their palm, and you shake their hand. That person would flinch in pain the moment you squeeze the hand, and that shocked you, because you wasn't aware of it. The person yelled at you because of the pain you've caused them, but you were innocent, and it wasn't your intention to hurt them at all.
Now, is it your fault for not knowing, or his or her fault for not telling about the thorn?
Sure, you can say you could have been more careful, more observant of the other person's behavior. Maybe that would have given you the hint that there was something wrong with his or her palm, leading you to ask them about it.
But truth be told, it is not your fault. The person eventually had to remove the thorn, or suffer the pain of having it inside. Why they chose to keep it there, is reasons they keep themselves.
That's what I meant by hurting people hurt others - people who are hurting on the inside, then to hurt others on the outside. Call me naive, but I like to believe that people are fundamentally good and noble, but their circumstances made them behave otherwise. And when they have something within that's causing them pain, it's their own responsibility to voice it out, or to work on it.
The hurt inside, it could be due to many things - betrayal, denial, fear of abandonment, insecurities, anger, trust issues, jealousy and more. The origin of those emotions differ from person to person, so they had to be worked on separately. There's no miracle pill or one-size-fits-all tweezers to remove the thorns. Only when the source of the pain had been removed, can the issue be solved, can the load on the shoulder be lightened, can the person be happy again.
What about you? Have you got a thorn that needs looking at?
Mini Motivation is my own daily strategy to inspire myself. Mostly 3-minute reads.
From Motivation, we gain Inspiration. From Inspiration, we achieve Momentum. And the rest, they say, is history.
Hope it helps nudge you a bit too in the right direction.
Oh it did? Let me know in the comments, and of course an upvote would be a nice motivation for me. :)
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So true...That's the reason why they say that when you're in anger, don't open your mouth... You'll never know what would come out..
Haha, that's so true!
This is probably right:
The worst thing is that this could create a negative dynamic in which people hurt another one, and then the second person does the same to a third one, and the third does the same again and so on...
I think the majority of people are like that, but there is a tiny minority who aren't good in my opinion.
Such is how the cycle starts. At one point, it takes someone to break the pattern by putting a stop to it.
Your article really triggered deep thought inside my mind. Sometimes you just not aware there is thorn you need to remove until you do a self reflection or some kind soul tells you.
For me, right now I think I don't have any but I will keep this into my subconscious mind and always be alert when I starts to hurt people around me.
Thank you Mav!
Self reflection is so key in personal growth, and glad to know that you have that Bro!
Thanks man! Glad I'm not late in knowing self reflection :)
I think there's never too late when it comes to self-reflection, nor is it too much of.