How to understand that you are unhappy in marriage: 9 signs

 

Almost all couples notice too late that their love has cracked. Family counselors and a life coach tell you what signs and troubles should be paid attention to while you can still fix it.
Assessment of the emotional state is an extremely subjective thing. For one, a happy marriage is one that gives a sense of stability, the other is happy as long as the marriage does not limit freedom, but supports and gives energy.
Here are some signs of an unhappy marriage, according to which experts suggest checking yourself.
1. LOW SELF-ASSESSMENT, CHRONIC ALARM OR DEPRESSION
People who are in unhappy love relationships are more prone to negative emotional states. Among them, there is a high level of neurosis and mental illness, which, in turn, exacerbate the feeling of dissatisfaction with the family situation.

2. LACK OF NEARBY AND ATTACHMENT
Physical intimacy distinguishes romantic relationships from everyone else. If we no longer have sex or if one of us feels rejected intimately, there are probably deeper problems in the pair. Sexual relationships often reflect the quality of the emotional connection and the level of satisfaction with the marriage.
3. ACCUMULATED IRRITATION
Those little "oddities", personal characteristics, habits that once seemed sweet (or at least tolerant) now cause negative emotional reactions for example, irritation or even disgust.

4. NO ONE HEARS, ONE HEARS ANYONE
“Listening” is the most effective way to show love. When a partner listens to us, we feel that we are important and appreciated. Although not everyone is given a hearing, this skill can be developed.

First of all, a complete presence is necessary, which means that all distracting factors must be eliminated. It is important not only to be as attentive as possible and try to understand the person you are talking to, but also to control facial expressions, emotions, and the body. We seem to be fading into the background and at the same time trying to take the place of the speaker.

When a person gives others compassion and compassion, the chances of full communication are greatly increased.

5. REPLACING THE PARTNER WITH OTHER
Instead of coping with problems in relations with a spouse, many prefer to contact friends. They help to be distracted and avoid conflicts with a partner.

6. “IMMEDIATE RIDERS” OF A DIVORCE
This includes criticism and accusations, a defensive position and a refusal to take responsibility, contempt and sarcasm, emotional disconnection and sabotage.

7. FANTASIES ABOUT LIFE WITHOUT A WIFE
Imagining a happy life without a partner, we renounce him and the problems associated with him. Such a mental escape robs us of the energy that is needed for the development or "repair" of marriage.

8. EMOTIONAL OR PHYSICAL CHANGE
The Internet erodes the concept of "treason." If earlier this was understood as a very specific action, now it is possible to change, as if doing nothing, not going anywhere. In fact, cheating can occur in the presence of the other spouse at the common dining table, when one of you flirts with someone on the phone. But both physical and virtual infidelities equally clearly speak of problems in the relationship of the spouses.

9. Divergent Ways
If my partner and I have a different worldview, values, dreams and goals, then the life that we imagined on our wedding day may no longer feel like “happily ever after.”

If you do not discuss your hopes, dreams and fears and do not try to resolve the differences that arise, our trajectories may soon turn into rapidly diverging lines of life.