Why Positivity Isn’t the Be-All and End-All of Happiness
Why Positivity Isn't the Be-All and End-All of Happiness
Ask most people, and they will inform you positivity is the key to happiness. After all, speak and think negatively and you'll feel bad. Do the opposite, and you'll feel the opposite. It makes sense. However, the road to a happy life isn't paved with smooth stepping stones; it's full of bumps and roadblocks, and there's no other route to your destination.
Too much positivity results in irrationality
Positiveness only results in the expansion of joy when it isn't a lie. Believe in sticking to the sunny side of the street? All well and good. Pretend you're there when torrents of rain fall on you, though, and you're in danger of looking foolish and upsetting your more rational mind.
You might imagine such sentiments are the cries of curmudgeons who don't recognize a good thing when they see it. Then again, perhaps cynics have a point. No matter how hard you try to make-believe everything's rosy when it isn't, your logical nature knows better. Your brain will fight attempts to bask in unwarranted positivity because it doesn't want you to be crazy. Nonetheless, there is a way to use positivity to your advantage, even when the sky is falling.
When positivity works
Understanding how to use positiveness makes all the difference between your efforts working and failing. Foolishness - as in pretending you don't need to improve your situation - doesn't work. Looking for the silver lining in setbacks, however, does.
Therapists know recognizing life lessons can help to heal painful memories. No matter what has happened, or is happening to you now, you'll cope best if you notice benefits exist. Even dire events can make you stronger and wiser, and herein lie positive outcomes on which to concentrate.
Flexibility and the acceptance of unwanted circumstances you can't change can make you happy too. Therefore, if there's a thunderstorm when you're throwing a garden party, you can choose to laugh and dance in the downpour. Or, you can become grumpy and miserable. Whether positive or negative, it's up to you which you select.
While positiveness isn't the complete answer to happiness, it is your friend. Use it wisely, and it will serve you. Indeed, you can rewire your brain by channeling your thoughts and actions toward a rational version of positivity. Live in a make-believe world where the journey to happiness is easy, though, and you'll stumble over the setbacks you pretend aren't in your path.
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Good post.
I see many people conflating contentment with happiness/joy. I get the feeling that what most people are after is actually deep, lasting contentment and peace.
In my own investigation and self-inquiry, I have found that spontaneous joy is a byproduct of contentment with oneself, not a direct result of effort and/or actions with aims.
Very rational. Good post brosef.
Thanks my good man, Inspired by the last talk. : )
Most welcome 😎
Thanks for those nuggets.
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Your post is highly motivational and advisory.
You really touched lives.
better to be realist instead of positive.
Yes only way to life in this world. Realize
The problem is that pessimistic people often think they are thinking realisticaly
Henry Ford once said: If you think you can do a thing or think you can't do a thing, you're right.
Ever seen the movie Yes man or read the book?
The core values are great, potentially addictive, but they're not long term. It's true, that positivity breeds positivity and negativity does the same to itself. Perhaps in the face of adversity, when all is to shit and every options is just as shit, that positivity can lead you to a wild card, unexpected moment. Maybe that's where the philosophy of this thinking is situated.
But
Realism helps, but it can also be the door to "negativity".
I think life is about a healthy balance of the two...
nice my best friend @zeartul
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I thought happiness was related to having enough options and resources to chase dreams or already be living the percieved dream. Depressed people are people who think they're out of options and stuck.
I'm always happy, why worry and worry, if you can not worry and do not worry.
totally agree. positivity to the exclusion of all other emotions is a contagion. balance is essential. there is no light without dark, no sun without rain.
Exactly, Being real and accepting that is what matters at the end.