Dreams

in #poetry7 years ago (edited)

As I lie here
With my little book of dreams
What was once clear
....Corrodes in front of me

You and I,
We were supposed to be together
All worries
Gone like a feather

Hey, can you tell me
About those days again
I look at the pages
....The meaning disappeared

I don't
What are you saying?
Am I not the same?
It's me
It's always been me

I look down again at the book
The happy words muddled in wet drips
Hey, can you tell me why
I don't even remember who you are

This that was once filled with love
Tainted
Splattered
B̶r̶o̶k̶e̶n̶

I did it
That's what my tears say
Yet I don't remember
Who you are

Is this why you're leaving?
Please!
I̶ ̶l̶o̶v̶e̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶

This tattered old book of dreams
It's not mine anymore
I now realize
I was the one who burnt it all

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https://weheartit.com/entry/301544501

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She began to lose her memories. Memories that she had written and cherished in her diary.

I love deep poetry. Most people go shallow or speak about what already exists, not what needs to be said or problems. You have great potential. Keep up the great text, work on your rhyming. Your grammar is shaggy, along with your perception, so try to work on getting the reader to understand your meaning correctly and more throughly.

Overall, I love this poem and how deep it is, so keep doing the deep stuff.

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