NIGHTMARES AT MID-DAY

I probably don't think you should understand but, I have to tell you.
You talked about not having to let you in.
Not talking about family.
Late night screams and strange utterances.
Well, I hope you don't get lost journeying with me tonight.

At 12 - My uncle would tie me up on his bed, blindfolded and mouth taped.
And I'd be asked which should be released; my sight or the voice.
At 17 - I had mastered the art of masochism.
At 27 - I tried to be celibate. I couldn't keep pretending to enjoy the things I don't with these strangers.
At 30 - The craving continued. Unmarried. Broken. A total mess.
At 32

• I met you. Everything did change for awhile. But when we had sex, I didn't feel it. It was just off. So, when I disturbed the neighbours those nights, I was running away from the devil who turned me in, my Uncle.
  I'm sorry.