Shadow waltz

Dancing in the shadows, I find my best friend
We haven't spoken in ages, which explains the look in her eyes
A gaze ripe with jealousy, sadness, pain, rage and despair
She's my mirror with a crack, the crack I can't repair
She would never let me anyway

Tiptoeing through the pain, avoiding her gaze like shards of glass
She grabs my hand and I grab my chest
The darkness finds its way through the cracks
I can't look away from the piercing gaze I know so well
She would never let me anyway

My breath becomes shallow but somehow gains depth
Awareness of my every molecule sweeps through my being
Suddenly we are the same
Just like old times
I squirm inside my skin and try to push her out
She would never let me anyway

I give into the pressure and expansion in my skin
This is where the real dance begins
Pushing through the walls I built to keep her out
I start to break and she cradles me in our loving arms
I scream and cry and try to cut her loose
She would never let me anyway

I give in and embrace the darkness
Oh how I've missed you my sweet friend
Our integration is sweet and painful
I fall to the floor and lose myself
Sinking into darkness and being pulled into light
I gasp for breath and find myself
In the dream we've dreamt a million times before

When I wake from the swirling dance of our unconscious
We feel complete
Final integration of my worst parts
Our favorite parts
Until the process starts again
I vow to never forget
I know that I'm lying to myself
We would never let us anyway