Self Indulgent Photography with No Context

About 7 or 8 years ago I purchased a Canon 7D with a few lenses for work. Like a lot of newbie DSLR owners with no photography experience, I was fascinated with the level of quality that I could get out of this thing while using only the auto setting.

I ran around taking pictures of everything that I could find. Then I did a little bit of reading and learned a little bit about aperture, exposure, depth of field, shutter speed, ISO etc.

Once again, like any silly amateur with an expensive toy, I was like, "OMG! wow guys check me out!", and I started taking pictures of everything that I came across like I was some kind of a Michelangelo of photography.

I remember this particular day, I was at a family wedding and had brought the camera along. All I had was my 7D, a 50mm lens and and a smug attitude. After the wedding, I thought, "I know, I'll walk around outside like a jackass and take a bunch of super close-up photos of random flowers and plants. No one has ever done that before!"

So I stuck the camera in Aperture Priority, and did just that.

So unique! I will so get a prize for this

OMG so dark and blurry in the back, but bright up front!

So pink yet so green. Look at me!

Focused in the front, blurred in the back. How did he do it!?

Of course if I was going to be a legitimate photographer, I needed to move on to some more advanced subjects. Like whatever the hell this thing is:

Who cares. Such texture! Such rust! Oh yeah rust. Rust makes everything look so cool and artistic. Oh lord Jesus I am such an artist.

Pro Tip: The rustier the subject, the more fine the art

An now for the pinnacle of my collection, the classic rotten fence door with the rusty latch. This image alone catapults me into photography stardom.

Pro Tip #2: Crank that clarity slider up until it looks like crap

But you know. As the day went on I began to realize that what the world needed was more photos of brick next to other stuff. So that's when I expertly took these next images.

Gee whiz! Such insane color boosting!

These next ones I have no explanation for. All I can say is WTF.

This one would sell for millions in a modern art gallery

Means so much, yet so little

Stuff juxtaposed with crap

And how about some random buildings with such amazing composition that it leaves the critics speechless.

Looks like a gator hanging on for dear life

Just because. Why not.

So okay, I had a bit of a laugh making fun of my former self. Of course some of these images are interesting to look at and not all of them are necessarily bad, but there was one point that I am really trying to make if you didn't catch it.

Don't go and buy yourself an expensive camera and immediately start signing every photo you take like you are some kind of photography god. You are not a photographer just because you can snap a picture. I mean, I guess technically you are, but practically you are not. Professional photography is a learned skill just like any other craft.

By arbitrarily declaring yourself an artist, a musician, a photographer or a whatever you wish that you were without putting the work in, you are making it harder for legitimate experts in these fields to find work, and even harder for employers and talent scouts to find good skilled workers in the sea of crap.

Remember that those who are paying to have a job done, often have no idea what good even looks like so they will pay a lot of money to charlatans for garbage that will make their company look bad. I'm not sure if that's a great argument against being a crap artist if you are just in it for the money, but what can I say.

I'm not saying this to be mean. Not at all! The point is to get people to look at themselves objectively and see that they can do better if they just put in the work. Nothing worth doing is accomplished overnight, except for overnight success stories, but let's forget about that for now.

I think that this whole idea that anything and everything is art is valid yet simultaneously troubling. It gives everyone free reign to be lazy and not even try. I'll leave you with this final photograph of me at the Tate Modern a few years back. This pretty much sums it all up.

Screw you guys, I'm going home.