I'm the Greatest Sea Horse Hunter in the World

A few years ago I went to Colombia, and clearly I was living my best life. I was in Barranquilla, if my foggy memory serves me right, and me and a friend had some time to kill. We found a park with animal playground equipment and took glamour shots.

Shortly after this picture was taken, I was in a hostel in Medellin, and out of sheer boredom decided that whenever anyone asked what I did for a living, I would tell them I was a Marine Biologist who was trying to find the largest seahorse in the ocean, or El Grande Caballo del Mar - as the locals call it - and that this search had led me to Colombia where we believe this magnificent creature had made its home near the coast.

The story, much like this picture is utter bullshit.

But seriously how cool would it be if there were giant seahorses?