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I recently had a conversation with some colleagues about the topic of death. It is a bit of a strange topic for discussion but it was quite interesting to say the least. We mostly discussed our relationship with the idea of death and how in Western society people tend to fear death, ignore it, and pretend like it doesn’t exists.

However, the conversation eventually took a turn when one of my colleagues stated that her partner used to fear death until he tried magic mushrooms (psilocybin). She stated that since taking mushrooms he no longer feared death. This comment prompted me to chime in and confirm what my colleague had said. I informed the group that the same thing had happened to me after I tried mushrooms. Soon after my comment, another colleague who was a part of the conversation also concluded that she no longer feared death, for the same reason.

From this conversation I naturally concluded that a common experience among individuals who consume magic mushrooms is an abandonment of the fear of death.

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Later that night, in trying to understand what takes place in the mind and brain when an individual consumes magic mushrooms, I contemplated my own mushroom experience further. Though I am not an expert on the subject or on the human mind in general, I nonetheless think that I have come to an understanding of what happens in the brain when an individual consumes psilocybin. However, I will note that this explanation is not based on science but rather on my own understanding of the brain along with my own interpretation of my experience.

A Brief Description of my Mushroom Experience

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After consuming a “heroic dose” of psilocybin mushrooms my awareness and vision became vivid and crisp. I experienced a clarity of mind and vision like nothing I had ever experienced before. There was no fogginess or hallucinations. To the contrary, my mind was clear and my awareness was heightened and precise. It wasn’t like being in a dream but rather, like being awake for the first time. I felt a connection to the present moment that went beyond any meditation practice I had ever engaged in. I could see energy radiating from the world around me that flowed from one object into the next seamlessly, as if the world is not made of distinct and separate objects, but rather one continuous mystery that cannot be separated. I felt that I was a part of my surroundings and I felt at one with the world and with the universe at large. In that moment I felt as though I was seeing god for the first time. God was not a personified being who lived in the clouds who secretly judged and controlled its minions. God was the singular energy that flowed through the universe that not only connected all things, but was all things. In that moment I lost all fear of death. In fact, I felt content and at peace with the idea of dying right then and there. I had seen everything that I needed to see and that I would ever need to see. Nothing in my life to come would ever be as important as this moment right now, so if it was my time to go, then I was okay with that. Time was infinite.

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At that moment I had not noticed it, but a shift had already taken place within my brain. It became apparent to me a little while later. Images began to pop into my mind and I began to questions things.

What is a mother? What is a sister? Why do I need to eat and drink to live? What is death and what does it even mean to be alive? Are you and I different people?

I had these questions and others, some of which would have been simple to answer under normal circumstances. However, in this moment I could not answer them, or think them through or even comprehend them if someone were to explain them to me. Actually, I could not “think” at all. I had completely and utterly lost my internal dialogue, and along with it, my minds way of reasoning. It wasn’t that I was having trouble with it, as if I couldn’t find the exact words to describe something - no. “Thought” didn’t even exist. I had complete blankness in the mind. I could talk fine out loud. But I could not for the life of me formulate a single word in my head.

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In that moment, I had complete awareness of myself and my environment and I remember every detail and every part of that night even to this day. I even knew in that moment that I wasn’t able to “think,” something that I was supposed to be able to do under normal circumstances. But even knowing all of that, I still could not will myself to think and formulate words in my mind.

Left and Right Hemisphere

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My understanding of the brain is that the right and left hemispheres generally communicate with one another and work together to create a full picture of reality for an individual. That being said, my understanding is that each hemisphere does in fact process information differently in that, each hemisphere takes on a more predominant role in certain brain functions. In other words, each hemisphere tends to focus its attention on different aspects of an individual’s reality and tends to provide a different function for the individual.

For instance, the right hemisphere tends to be involved in things like feelings and emotion, visualization, imagination, creativity, intuition and holistic thinking.

On the other hand, the left hemisphere tends to be involved in things like language, logic and reasoning, facts, linear thinking and sequencing. Unlike the right brain which tends to focus on the big picture of things, the left brain is said to process information about the finer details of life.

Taking these concepts together and simplify things, we could say that the role of the right brain is to interpret an individual’s reality through feelings and intuition whereas the role of the left brain is to interpret an individual’s reality through words and logic.

What Happens in the Brain when on Mushrooms

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What I believe happens when an individual takes a high dose of psilocybin mushrooms is that the left hemisphere of the brain shuts down (or takes on a much lesser role in interpreting reality than what the individual is used to). This has the effect of allowing the individual to perceive their reality strictly through right hemisphere processing. If this is correct then I believe that it explains my personal experience with mushrooms.

Since the logic, reasoning and internal language functions of the brain shut off when psilocybin is consumed the individual is no longer able to perceive their reality through words. This would explain not only why I was unable to think or formulate words in my head but also why I perceived my environment to be a singular, continuous, non-separated mystery. My brain was essentially unable to categorize objects and separate them from one another - with words. It would also explain why I felt an immense sense of oneness with the universe. I was only able to perceive my reality through intuition, feeling and emotion.

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It is common during a mushroom trip, for time to lose all meaning for an individual. Many people on mushrooms (including myself) talk about time being perceived much more slowly or as infinite. This may also be explained by the idea that the left hemisphere shuts down when the individual is on mushrooms. Since the left hemisphere tends to be associated with sequential ordering of events/things, the individual may not be able to perceive time in a linear fashion as they are typically accustomed to doing.

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If I am correct in that the individual relies solely on right hemisphere processing when on mushrooms, the aspects associated with right hemisphere functioning would likely also be amplified. This is due to the fact that one of the brains normal filters (the left hemisphere) is removed. Removal of the left hemisphere filter may cause more information to be processed through the right hemisphere. As such, the individual would perceive their experience of reality through a heightened sense of feelings, emotion and intuition.

Image by Sarah Prout

Furthermore, when an individual is on psilocybin, I believe that they also take in more sensory data then they would naturally when not under the mushrooms influence. This is especially the case for visual data. This is because their eyes (specifically their pupils) dilate to an extreme. Increased pupil dilation means that increased amounts of photons reach the individuals retina, optic nerve and part of the brain that processes visual information. As such, the individual perceives their reality in high definition simply because they are taking in more visual data. In these moments, perhaps we can even see energy which always surrounds us but which we are typically unaware of? Perhaps we can also perceive photons bouncing off objects? This would explain why I perceived energy to be radiating from objects in my environment.

The Loss of Fear of Death

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As stated at the beginning of this article, a common experience for individuals on mushrooms appears to be a complete abandonment of their fear of death. I personally believe that this comes from the feeling of oneness that the individual experiences when on mushrooms. Since the left hemisphere functions turn off, the individual is unable to perceive their reality through words, logic and/or reasoning. As such, they are unable to separate themselves from their surroundings, which gives them a feeling of oneness with the universe. They are also unable to explain what is happening or what they are seeing so the individual perceives their experience as a mystery and like me, may label that mystery - “God.” If an individuals does not feel as though they are a separate thing/person but instead feels that they are part of the mystery’s oneness then they may also feel as though they are a part of God. If the individual feels that they are a part of god then there really is no reason to fear death.

Conclusion

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This explanation of what is happening in the brain when an individual is on mushrooms is of course very generalized and simplified. I am sure that there is much more taking place within a person’s mind and brain. For instance, I am sure that the left hemisphere of the brain does not shut off entirely but that some functions continue to operate. Similarly, it is possible that many of the functions of the right hemisphere also shut down. Individuals may also have different experiences while on mushrooms.

Nonetheless, I hope that my interpretation makes sense. If you disagree of have your own thoughts of what is taking place in the brain and mind when an individual consumes magic mushrooms, please feel free to share them with me in the comments.

Thanks for Reading

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For similar article that I have written on magic mushrooms or a more in depth explanation of my heroic dose story please see below:

Where is my Mind: a heroic dose Part III

Saying Goodbye: a heroic dose Part II

Inside the Belly of the Worm: a heroic dose Part I

Fragmented Lessons Taught by a Fungus: Part II

Fragmented Lessons Taught by a Fungus: Part I