No One is Coming: This One Realization will Change Your Life(it did mine)[Self-Development]

     The Six-Pillars of Self-Esteem is a book that defined the course of my life. I am not going to go in to a full book review at this time, but I cannot recommend it enough! This is not some fluffy rah rah speech about how everyone is a winner and deserves a participation trophy, not at all. This is down to the brass tacks of letting go of negative assumptions and beliefs that keep us from cultivating and living with a healthy sense of self and relation to the world around us! I have read this book 4 time since I first discovered it, it gets richer every time!

     Today I want to talk about a concept in the book that is not one of the six pillars but nevertheless is one of the biggest things I learned. The first time I read it this is probably all I heard:

      "One of the most important of such moments is when the client grasps that no one is coming. No one is coming to save me; no one is coming to make life right for me; no one is coming to solve my problems. If I don't do something, nothing is going to get better. 

     The dream of a rescuer who will deliver us may offer a kind of comfort, but it leaves us passive and powerless. We may feel if only I suffer long enough, if only I yearn desperately enough, somehow a miracle will happen, but this is the kind of self-deception one pays for with one's life as it drains away into the abysss of unredeemable possibilities and irretrievable days, months, decades."

     So who are you waiting for? When I read this passage I realized suddenly and horrifically I had been waiting for some unknown rescuer, to make it all better, to lift me out of all my bad habits and weak choices. But as Emerson said, "Life wastes itself while we are preparing to live." I lost years of my life waiting for someone to make it right, who's permission do you need to change your life?

     You are your own redeemer, you get to be your own rescuer. You decide, today I save my own life. It is this pivotal moment that everything changes, you decide to throw the garbage food out, to get the gym membership, to quit your job, to take the job, to ask them out, to get the divorce... 

     If you are struggling to think of what action you need to take, you can use your own resistance to doing it like a compass, it will always point you in the right direction. So ask yourself what part of your life you're waiting to be rescued from, then rescue yourself! Roll up the sleeves, lace up the boots, and ask yourself, "If not me, then who?" Then get to work. 

All the best friends,

If you enjoyed this little article let me know and I will write more, it was just a whim so I don't know how it will be received!