The Invisible hand, as reported by myself

The Invisible hand, as reported by myself.

What exactly is this invisible hand controlling me? Every moment, keeping from me that moment. I don’t notice before the transaction and after, I was asleep in that moment it happened. If I was awake in that moment, I would see it controlling me. Are my thoughts even my own? they have to be. I think therefore I am. How do I know I am alive, just because I put a smile on my face? Are my thoughts the result of programming? Are my circumstances the result of an Icarus deception? And what is my purpose? am I supposed to know? am I worth it?

I see now that my worth is my own, my destiny, my truth, my circumstance, my God. This is my power, which if someone else holds they control me. I must take it back now, here in this moment with meditation. I must watch these thoughts. Let go of fear of the darkness, and accept its lessons. So that I may have solutions to these problems which without there would be no solution. I chose these circumstances, I chose them. I chose them, when I existed without myself. At the same time I must see my past not as a definition of myself. And come to know these momentary actions I take as.

Fear of the meditation I must overcome. Because it contradicts my search for truth, which is dark and painful. Like how a child who burnt its finger on a hot stove knows not to do it again. I enter the void, I see there is no space between me and my dream. No time in between, just a blink of God’s eye. Through that I, I see all and am illuminated with light I can use. Which I can shine on that hand, and it will control me no more.

The invisible hand, Mr. Robot

(a few quotes from the show)
The invisible hand. It deceives. Manipulates us. It controls us.
We con the public. That is the business model for this great nation of ours. Every business day when that market, we con people into believing in something. The American Dream. Family values. It does not matter. As long as the con works, and people buy and sell. Whatever it is we want them to.
Krista Gordon: And what is it about society that disappoints you so much?
Elliot: Oh, I don't know. Is it that we collectively thought Steve Jobs was a great man even when we knew he made billions off the backs of children?... Or maybe it's that it feels like all our heroes are counterfeit. The world itself's just one big hoax. Spamming each other with our burning commentary bullsh*t masquerading as insight. Our social media faking as intimacy. Or is it that we voted for this. Not with our rigged elections but with our things, our property, our money. I'm not saying anything new, we all know we do this, not because "Hunger Games" books make us happy, but because we want to be sedated. Because it's painful not to pretend because we're cowards... F - - society.
Elliot: Sometimes I dream of saving the world. Saving everyone from the invisible hand, the one that brands us with an employee badge, the one the forces us to work for them, the one that controls us every day without us knowing it. But I can't stop it. I'm not that special. I'm just anonymous. I'm just alone.

I said:
“Under the influence of this hand always, for me there exist no control especially when I buy and sell. I believe in my conditions, a believe sold to I by myself. The self must be the illusionist.”