I have read recently about a post in our community of one's perseverance not to give up on one's goals and dreams. The problem with me, I often think outside of the box and, I often try to explore the opposite end. For me, that would be knowing!when to give up and say, ENOUGH! Few people manages to recognize or do these mainly because they might not find anything wrong with it. Here are some of things that I believe are worth giving up not just for the purpose of growing up and moving on but pursuing one's peace and happiness.

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Relationships

Not all relationships are great nor are they beneficial or good for all. I am not just speaking about intimate relationships wherein one party physically, mentally or economically abuse the other.I am referring to common friendships. That person you think is helpful at work might secretly be speaking to others about how incompetent or incapable you are professionally. Your childhood best friend who became your shoulder to cry on in your trying times might be spreading gossips about you and might be secretly scrutinizing your choices in life. Or, the people who you are helping might not really be in need for help. Perhaps, they are just abusing your compassion and have grown to be dependent from the help you are extending.

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Its really painful to know of all the betrayals that come from these relationships and most of the time, people will opt to give them a second chance. What if the second time around is more or less the same or worst?

Its hard to give up on anyone especially if you've grown accustomed to them. In the case of married couples or people in intimate relationships, sometimes, the aggrieved party would decide to remain in the same situation where they are. It might be because they are emotionally or economically dependent to the aggressor. Some might even believe that this is all part of being married.

I have to admit that there are some trials and tribulations in any type of relationship but, being assaulted in anyway is not part of it.

Cultural Perception

When I was in elementary, some of my classmates kept bullying me because of my big butt, my mom would always console me by quoting from this:

Matthew 5:10-12 New International Reader's Version (NIRV)

Blessed are those who suffer for doing what is right.
The kingdom of heaven belongs to them.

Apparently, my mom thought that in order for me to be holy, I need to allow someone else to torture, assault, bully me because, I will be inheriting the kingdom of god. In fairness to her, she got that right. Its just that I do not fully agree with that.

As an adult, I do not really think that there is any god out there who relishes in the sufferings or pain of its followers unless its a BDSM cult or something. I still believe that the dignity and well being of an individual should be at the utmost importance.

This is another entry on things I hate about my culture. We were conditioned to think and believe that suffering is a way to holiness and accepting whatever our circumstances are is the only choice we have.

Being rich and famous

There is another lie out there that people all over the world kept propagating: the lie that when you have money, you can be happy. When you are famous, you have everything in life.

Not everyone who are rich can buy anything with their money. They might be able to buy expensive bags and shoes, go to exotic holiday destination, experience the best services out there, be treated respectfully. I have met rich people who cannot sleep at night because of the fear that someone will steal their fortunes from them. Or, they might be so obsessed with earning more that they shun other parts of their lives like their family or physical well being.

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On the other hand, that person you see who looks flawless, gorgeous or who looks young for their age might have spent a fortune to look like that. Being beautiful sometimes is painful. Just try browsing on line and see how it hurts to get a facial or how hard it is to walk on those high heels simply for the sake of looking sexy and beautiful. The flawless skin you see on a celebrity's face might not be the product of persistent skin care: it just might be a make up illusion.

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Its not really a bad thing to be rich and famous. But equating these two concepts as an indicator of happiness or success is not. At the end of the day, money does not buy happiness. It cannot buy friendship or loyalty. Most of all, it cannot buy peace or love. Same is true with being beautiful. It does not buy you confidence. Its not a gateway to a better life. If it is for you right now, it is likely that you are dabbling in any form of prostitution or pornography.

Goals and dreams

All dreams and goals in life are meant to make us into better people. But there are those times when these tend to corrupt others. Take for example an actress who wanted to maintain her fame and fortune by working tirelessly disregarding other aspects of her life. Or a screwed businessman who would go into extremes to be on top of the market by either cheating or manipulating others. There's the parents who would strictly make their children study endlessly to prepare for their "future life and career" and neglect their needs as children.

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Survival and life is a competition. Normally, these concepts are accepted as part of the process of achieving one's goals and dreams. But what if its taken into extremes? Learn to draw the line and know the difference of having a dream or a goal that is beneficial in the long term against one that would slowly corrupt and destroy one's being.

Its all right to give up

Its all right to give up. Its all right to admit that one is defeated or a failure. It is a part of being a person. Let go of all the things and people that troubles you. This is not a sign of weakness or unworthiness but that of bravery and openness to change.

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So let go. Its all right . You'll get through it eventually.