The demonic twos - lessons learned

Hey Steemit.

My wife and I have spent the last two months battling our toddler. Forget the terrible twos, he's gone through the Demonic twos.

His behaviour has been extreme, constant tantrums, agression (including hitting and kicking his brother), refusing to sleep or eat and general destruction.

Let's share some background...
He's had a lot of change recently, gaining independence, a new brother, moving groups at day care, a dad with severe depression and anger issues and his mum having surgery.

Essentially it's been an extremely trying time for us, especially with a new born and me overcoming my own demons.

A word I used at the start was battling, and with this lies what i've learned:

• breath
• it's about guiding their growing and learning as they gain their independence - don't fight them
• turn off the tv anda tually have family time
• give them options so they feel in control
• show love, compassion and empathy - even if you don't have the energy for it
• be consistent in your approach so a boundry is set
• work with your spouse, not against them
• don't stress about the adult time you're missing out on - because your building and strengthening your relationship with your child. Adult time will come
• walk away - if you're too stressed, they know it. Make a hot drink and get away for five minutes. Leave your phone out of reach and go outside, stare at the grass or sky.

After a week from changing my perspective, he's not awake until after midnight (10 minutes to go to sleep instead of hours), he's happier in all aspects of his life, i'm calmer and can actually deal with the situation as a responsible adult, and my wife and I are back on track.

Thank you for taking the time to read my post. I just needed to get my experience put down in words and hopefully help someone else out there who's having a hard time.

Take care Steemit.