Abuse made easy: When a perfectly normal trip to the supermarket could have ended really badly

Earlier today I read this post by @honeydue Now my first thought was that while I certainly didn't agree with current clothing trend that seem to sexualise children I wasn't actually against the modelling industry.

After all, before clothing trends took the dive they have and before social media and somewhat shallow parents clothes needed models, whatever the age. I've worked in fashion and I can't attack the industry as a whole, some of it still allows children to be children (A child may be selected to model for one advert, or photo shoot. get given a load of cool new clothes, then continue with life as normal.)

But the part about how it now makes things easier for some individuals sank in, I'm very careful about my own children's clothing choices (I detest skinny cut trousers on my little girl and buy her boys ones because they are still straight cut.) and how I represent them on social media.

This isn't so much of a response to the points made by honeydue directly - though please do go read them. However what I witnessed this evening scared me, and made me think back to that post because of certain points resonating with this event.

I had nipped to the supermarket. As I was walking into the store I saw a little girl, who couldn't have been much older than my own daughter (4), dressed in a Lolita dress and little high heels come happily skipping out of the store. I expected her parent or other responsible guardian to follow within a few moments but no-one did.

Reference image to show an idea of the dress style

So I stopped and I watched her continue to skip to a car that was parked near the door and try to get in.
When she couldn't she skipped back into the store. At this point I did follow her back in and watched as the store staff tried to get her to stay at the front desk (obviously to then locate an adult that was obviously going to be looking for her.) They child wouldn't stay put and ran off further into the store shouting mummy. This is when you hear another voice shouting the child by name. Eventually mother and child are reunited but the mother is still shouting a child's name. This is when I see another, younger, child in a similar outfit. I had seen the direction the mother had gone off in and made sure the child could find her.

At this point I am happy to start my shopping.

And then the mother starts shouting again, followed by the shouts of mummy. within a matter of minutes the child had lost her mother again.

This continued, while I did my shopping.

When I left the store the mother and two children were still in there (though no longer shouting for each other) as I walked out the doors to return to my car I noticed the car the first little girl had attempted to get into was gone.

Yes gone, meaning it wasn't their car.

What if someone had actually been in that car and the little girl had got in? With that merry little skip as if nothing was out of place.

Would whoever was in the car have been the type of person to return the child to the store, or to drive off?

Now I know for what ever type of person that could have been, her clothing wouldn't have made any difference to them.
I do also believe that when an adult makes clothing choices they shouldn't be judged for those choices and labelled in a way that over sexulises them because at least with adults it is 100% their choice what they wear.
With children though the parent buys the clothes. The child may be old enough to make a choice on what to wear that day (I've had enough of I'm going to wear snow boots in the middle of summer or very recently my daughter deciding she never wants to take off her amazing new paw patrol pyjamas) But if you allow certain types of clothing choices, a child is dressed in a way that isn't age appropriate and not be able to keep an eye on them late at night in a relatively quiet super market then yes predators are going to see that as an "easy target"

That may have got a little ramble-y, but I really couldn't believe such a thing nearly happened right in front of my eyes.

---

_{Borosilicate flameworker and geek}

^{Image source: lolita fancy dress costume
TeamGB signature banner by @bearone}