Welcome To The Carnival.

in #panegyric7 years ago (edited)

TRACK 1 BELL

The leaves blending from the ground into the distant sun were crunching on the sidewalk as the voice of neighbors passed by the open window.

“I love this season”. The crisp air of autumn carried the vibrations of music through the air filling the room “The carnivals in town” said Jimmy’s mother.

“I know mom.” he declared with a sense of obviousness looking up from his book. Climbing off the couch near the open window and after a moment staring blankly at his toys on the floor, he enthusiastically pronounced, “I’m hungry, can we go and get some hotdogs and nachos! Thomas wants me to meet him there. I want to play the ring a bottle. I know I can win a giant hat this year. We were so close last time!”

“I’ll take you but you’ve got to do something for me first”

“But i don’t want to!”

“Those leaves need to be swept away from the sidewalk before someone slips and falls. Ill pay for the tickets; you sweep the leaves, it’s only fair.”

Jimmy looked out the window and moaned like a widow who lost her husband at sea.

The sounds of the carnival become closer as a breezy air rushes through the opening front door.

“What’s he fussing about?” A man asked taking off his winter coat, stepping towards the woman in the room and kissing her on the forehead.

“He wants to meet Thomas and Sarah at the carnival but i told him he’s got to earn it. We can’t let our special brat be a spoiled rotten special brat.” She smirked and the front of her hair rustled slightly

Looking thoughtfully, “Well it is getting late. How about he helps you clean the living room right quick then we head on over? It looks like they have the zipper this year and i haven’t been on that since highschool!" Turning toward Jimmy, “Did you finish Great Gatsby?” his father asked.

“Just about done.” He responded.

He looked at Jimmy’s mother confidently.

“Your mother and I just discussed it. We can go to the carnival, just pick up your book and put your toys away.”

The ship was coming to shore! Looking out the window he jumped up and down on the couch.

His mother chimed in. “We can’t go for to long, it’s getting dark.”

Jimmy slowed his cleaning, frustrated at the new restriction.

“Hurry! Clean up and grab your coat Jimmy, I want to go too. I’m looking forward to the gourmet carnival treats!” she smiled, swooning exaggeratedly.

He as quickly as possible tossed all his toys in a box and placed the book on the shelf. His parents went to the other room looking for their autumn gear. Jimmy slid across the hardwood floor in his socks with the form of an experienced professional. He reached for the coat hooks and threw his jacket on his shoulders and snugged his feet in his shoes. He opened the door and ran out onto the front patio.

“I’m ready mom!”

“Alright, alright, we’re coming.”, she sang. As his father and her both stepped into the doorway, seeming to be smiling at each other about some hidden secret.

“Tie your shoes and let’s go.”

They started the trek with excitement in the atmosphere. The gas lit sky stretched out beyond them as they paced out the door, down the driveway and shuffled across the leaves on the sidewalk. It was a short walk from here not far out of town, a brief jog from the house. As they walked under the painted trees, Thomas rode by on what sounded like an old motorcycle with a slack timing chain. He rode up near to Jimmy and his parents with a three of clubs in his bike spokes.

“Me and Sarah are going to beat the top score on ring a bottle, come with me i’m gonna meet her there. “ He cried out to Jimmy.

Jimmy looked pleadingly at his father. “I want you to stay with us tonight” His father said with a reluctant tone, understanding the need for a boy to go and play with his friends but also realizing it was getting dark quickly.

The darkening fire above them burnt across the horizon much like the fire now burning in Jimmy’s chest. He didn’t want to hang out with his parents the whole time, he looked like such a loser being paraded around by them.

“I can’t right now," Jimmy said to Thomas. "Maybe i’ll catch up with you a bit later.”

“Well we’re gonna win those prizes, I can’t promise we’ll share!” Thomas yelled over a humming tick as he rode off.

‘You can go with them tomorrow when it’s a bit earlier” his mother stated sympathetically as they continued the short march.

Jimmy looked up from his mournful gaze and was captivated by the lights, now right in front of them. The gate rose above his glance, wrought iron, as old as the music chiming through its bars.

“That’ll be 20 dollars for three.”, said a voice coming from a booth. He looked through the bars at all the games and rides he wanted to go on without his parents walking him along like some dog on a leash. As he glared through them, they disappeared as the gate was opened.

His father reached down and gave thomas his ticket “Keep that, you can win prizes.”

“OHHH elephant ears!” his mother interupted giddily beside him as she paced towards a food cart.

“I’m gonna go get ride coins Jimmy, stay with your mom and get some food” he said joining the migration towards the ride booth.

“Are you still hungry?” His mother asked “They have hot dogs AND nachos.

“Oh i suppose so.”, said Jimmy following his mom to get in line.

As he stood there next to her, he saw kids he recognized running and playing with each other. At the front of the line a girl with a paper cap, he couldn’t see all that well over the height of the counter, asked “What would you two like?”

“What do you want Jimmy?” Turning to addressing her son

“I’m not that hungry, I just want a hotdog now.”

“Ok but don’t ask me for food later.”

Now addressing the clerk. “I’ll take two hotdogs and an elephant ear.”

“Elephant ears take about 10mins. Is that alright?”

“Oh that’s fine, my husband just joined the exodus towards the ride booth. We’ll be waiting a bit.”

The girl reached over with a smile and handed the hotdogs to his mother, as she did so Jimmy saw her masked face. He could swear her eyes stared right at him turning to a rainbow of color.

“Here’s your hotdog Jimmy” Snapping him out of it. “I need to go over there for the other food”, she said pointing towards a lit kitchen window on the side of the cart. “Sit here on this bench.”

He reluctantly turned away feeling even more like a dog now sitting on command. Matters being worse he was being forced by his captors to eat one of his own kind.

He looked up from the hotdog, he tried to hide that he was enjoying, to see Thomas and Sarah running on the other side of the carnival grounds. “Maybe i can catch them real quick and beat the high score on the ring toss!” he thought anticipatedly, now looking for his dad, who was surely still in line. He scarfed down his delicious hotdog, glanced around once more and ran free under the electric moonlight. Breathing in the crisp air, he trafficked towards the direction he saw them. Excitement built up in him as he became surrounded by rides and games and strangers, now free to roam and find his pack. He heard a warm voice coming up near by, crackling above the sounds around him. “Ladies and gentleman welcome to the carnival. Step right up! Step right up!” It shouted.

He rotated to look. There, he saw a man dressed up as a clown in a striped costume with exotic colors he couldn't seem to remember the names for.

“Step on up!”

Next to a tower as tall as his house with a bell at the top of it, “One lucky ticket holder gets a free shot at winning a prize, three jumbo hats!” Yelled the clown. “369! 369! Check your tickets for the winning numbers!”

Jimmy walked in closer “This is it!”, he thought. An opportunity to make up for looking like such a dork when not being able to go with Thomas earlier. Coming to them with his trophies from the game he conquered would for sure provide him with some reverence.

Jimmy rustled through his pockets searching for his ticket as he felt the serrated edge of it rub against his fingertips. He viciously pulled it from his pocket, scanning it for its numbers.

Sure enough it was a match!

Jimmy ran up to the Clown “I have it! I have the ticket!” creating a small windstorm, swirling it in front of the clowns face. The clown looked at him with a familiar..? thoughtful..? No.. masked stare and multi-colored eyes you could get lost in. He stared for a couple of seconds as if he could read Jimmy's very soul. Then a smile spread graciously across the painted canvas and said in a low warm crackling voice "Well step right up.” Bending down and reaching an arm backwards towards the tower, a button burst on his uniform as he started roaring with an ominous laugh. He grabbed a hammer handing it to Jimmy.

Preparing himself for the task ahead he walked towards the base, lifted the mallet towards the north pole, then bringing it behind himself, arched his back and launched the hammer like a rocket, colliding down on the obelisk’s base. A short metal cylinder shot up with incredible speed, slowing slightly near the top and... Ding!, It hit the bell!

He won! People behind him swooned in awe. The clown laughed the same sinister laugh.

“Here you go boy, it’s your lucky day”, he crackled reaching for the spoils. “Your lucky hats.”

“Perfect” he thought. He grabbed the hats once again meeting the chilling gaze of the clown. Quickly he put one on his head and tucked the other two under his arms. Now he could brag about winning. It may help his friends forget his parents were to lame to let him go earlier. “They probably haven't even won anything yet.” He thought. And In that moment he began to wonder where his parents were. He twirled around. They werent anywhere in sight. Jimmy spun franticly like a carousel. He had forgotten where he came from! He started to walk off searching for someone he knew. A cold breeze chilled his spine as he heard the clown’s voice echo across the slowly emptying carnival grounds.

“Step right up and hit the bell!” He realized he was very alone. The laughs seemed to grow louder behind him as he began his dizzying search. His steps seemed in rhythm with each laugh making him feel almost controlled by them. 1 step and a chuckle, 2 and a chuckle, 3 step, DING!

Epilogue

Experience helps us realize and appreciate the things that matter most.

Its easy for adults to see when their kids take things for granted. But when it comes to ourselves it’s a very different story. We go through a lot of life not looking. We’re like blind men running their fingers along walls in a world we can’t see. Enjoying whatever sensation we can, feeling like we’re getting somewhere.

I can confidently say we’ve all looked back at something and said “wow i didn’t really take advantage of that opportunity”, or “wow that person really cared about me i didn’t do a good job at acknowledging that.” Sometimes what we need is perspective. We need to runway and get lost at the carnival to realize who brought us. To be able to see that person or situation or the universe itself, provided us with what we needed. But we ran away because the grass was greener. Because we wanted to be the stars of a book with a script we didn’t control. Forgetting what matters to you and chasing temporary satisfaction.

In a way we’re all just lost at a carnival. Blinded by the bright lights and sensations of it all.

We will be releasing the song this story inspired, Bell, Friday October 13th, free for 2 weeks only, on our Bandcamp here.

Please like our Facebook. Under follow on our page press 'see first' to be sure to get the single's we will be releasing one at a time every two weeks. I will be writing a bit about each song in preparation for their release's, you will find links for theses on our Facebook as well. These releases have a been long time coming. After 100's of hours and 1000's of dollars we've done it! Stay tuned, you're gonna want to.

Special thanks to Cody Limbaugh to motivating me to write again, through our conversations, motorcycle rides (VBMC) and reading of his articles. You can find content from Cody here on Steemit and here on his website titled, Live All Your Life.

Bell Lyrics

The Carnivals in town

I know i really wanted

Lights and sounds

I know i really wanted

Hot dogs and nachos

I know i really wanted

A red letter day or so it goes

Great Gatsby

I know i really wanted

Eyes on me

I know i really wanted

Grass greener

I know i really wanted things so fine i forgot what i need

It was Magnus in the beginning

Just adventure that was all fun

But man things got hard before my time was done

We can keep on living like our actions don’t speak tons

Take away our ideals until we’re left with none

Left here alone yes i am

Looking at these places i now condemn

The same old song keeps playing

Now the glamour's gone. Thoughts stem.

Familiar faces how i’m missing

They helped me learn because they cared.

What had i underrated now confined to my values and Im scared.

Simple vocation

I know i really wanted

Daydream notation

I know i really wanted

Cloud nine application

I know i really wanted a reason to run away

Great Gatsby

I know i really wanted

Eyes on me

I know i really wanted

Grass greener

I know i really wanted

things so fine i forgot what i need

It was Magnus in the beginning

Just adventure that was all fun

But man things got hard before my time was done

We can keep on living like our actions don’t speak tons

Take away our ideals until we’re left with none

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