The Daily Spectacle

in #neoxian5 years ago

On a more serious note, if you would like to send in your stories to the daily spectacle about something funny that happened on our discord server then please drop me a line.

If I publish it I'll give you a share of the rewards. For example, if you gave me a story and I publish 3 of them, I will share my rewards like so: 10% me, 60% other story givers, 30% to you.

Remember though, the daily spectacle is committed to the philosophy of "do no harm" so whilst you find us funny we will not publish anything that causes conflict, or will shame anyone.

Now that's over and done with on with the show:

A strange sleeping sickness has taken over the city of Neoxian over the last two days

Locals and regular visitors alike have been struck down with a rare sleeping sickness that seems to render most people inert for a large part of the day. Our expert Doctors are calling the experience "real life syndrome," it's a rare illness that seems to disappear on its own with a little bit of effort.

Doctors are advising people to close their curtains, switch on the computer, and play excessive amounts of Steem monsters for an entire day. Maybe shack up to citizen @zaku, apparently he really knows how to play that game. Doing so should keep the lurgy at bay.

If you know anyone that's experiencing real life syndrome then please be advised to allow them time to recover. Real life syndrome can be highly contagious; it is known to manipulate it's host into thinking real life syndrome is better and healthier for them. It's best to ignore sufferers until they appear back in the city, and pretend they hadn't even left. Smile about their experience, but don't talk about it much. Doing so may cause extreme relapse.

Infidelity is rife in the City

In a statement made by our fearless leader, he documented the ways in which Gods Unchained is very similar to Steemmonsters; it has it's ups and downs like any platform, but it's very graphically beautiful. This caused an tsunami of new neoxianers giving Gods Unchained a bash. 

Gods Unchained is now like the servers dirty little secret,

We have the wife, Steemmonsters on Friday, and then we take out the girlfriends on Saturday -- it's a win win situation

Said one good-fella.

Super Duper Man Doesn't like S&M

In a wild statement earlier today, Super Duper Man doesn't actually like S&M; he's tried it of course, but apparently being whipped and chained doesn't really do anything for him. It's not his cup of tea.

This of course angered those that owned their own harems; furiously writing in letters to  the Tribe council that Dragons shouldn't have opinions on things that they aren't interested in -- it only dissuades healthy young ladies from liking to be spanked furiously.

He's in a position of power; he should understand that what he tells us counts

Said one angry perverted bastard.

It was only later that we realised he was talking about Steemonsters, and that context actually does matter when we publish these stories, or people get outraged. Oh the shame!

Our Pope is recovering well from laryngitis and is well on her way to recovery

Our very own high papal position has been struck down with laryngitis, causing her to speak only in emoji's for the last two days. 

Lots of pink sparkly happiness stuff -- which we commend her for keeping up with her position of healer in the community. We hope she has a speedy recovery and will integrate with us very soon!

Lastly, Chef @burlaj to supply entire city with cola

@Burlaj is going to provide the entire city with his drink.

In a spectacular display of selflessness, you can now finish off with a free tasty drink after spending some time with Burl's meat.

Burl is like me in a sense, giving what he can to the city. This man should be truly commended. We would recommend free meat and drink parties hosted by burl, but then that might be too much for him as he is already spreading himself a bit too thin.

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I've been suffering from RLS all day, I haven't even posted today at all! There MUST be a cure!!!

Posted using Partiko Android

There is! Close curtains, come inside the city, and if symptoms persist? > Steem Monsters lol

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