My letter I wrote my neighbour before I left

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                                Enough With Your Smelly Sound-proofing and Tall Gerbils
                            
        Dear Mr Davis,

I have always felt proud living near to you. You are the most lonely neighbour a person could ever meet.

Therefore, you must understand how difficult it has been for me to approach you with this matter.

I'm afraid I can no longer stand your untidy hedge.

I lay in bed last night, trying to sleep, and all I could think about was how your sound-proofing is too smelly and your gerbils way too tall. I had a nightmare that you burst in through the window brandishing a hedge trimmer

I have to insist that you take action to stop your untidy hedge from upsetting me. I demand that you sell the dog then rehome to dog.

And while we're on the matter, I'm finding your smelly gerbils increasingly inexcusable. This is not the kind of behaviour I expect from somebody living in a happy neighbourhood like Rose Close.

If you don't rectify the situation I shall have no choice but to call the council and post photos of your untidy hedge on Goodreads.

Furthermore, I have close ties with gangsters and I won't be be afraid to cash in a few favours if you don't comply with my demands.

Thanks
a-poetry-fanatic