Chapter #1 a real ghost kicking me out of my body

Chapter #1 'The Person behind the Story'

I grew up in Germany Gütersloh.
Im in the mid 30's now.
Before this all happened i was the most logical thinking person in the world. A friend asked me about paranormal activity (the movie) and i remember me laughing at him asking how he can take such c movie seriously while others took into consideration 'how it would be if something like this happened to them'. Not me. Something like that just doesnt exist.
One day i was at a friends house, he had some pets, three spiders and a rat.
We were talking about his new drone when an annoying sound came from the rats cage. It became so annoying that i had to look over to see whatsup, the rat immediately turned around like i have caught it doing something its not supposed to do acting like its washing itself but always have one eye looking at me.
I found this so odd. It almost looked like human behavior. I wanted to observe the rat more but the friend took my attention away from it even in a slight aggressive way like he doesnt want me to observe wich got me even more suspected.
Later that evening the same thing happened, the rat literally making noise at the cage to get my attention and the friend realized it and said 'let the rat alone pls'.
I looked into rats on youtube later that evening. Stunning how often these little pets look so humanlike.
I decided to get me two rats and two weeks later i bought them.

I was a pro pc gamer these days. I played up to 16 hours a day and to relax after such a stressfull day i heared music on my headset and closed the eyes.
One day i found a meditation mix called merlins magic (you gotta search for it, its magical indeed).
I sat myself cross-legged on the bed put the headset on and closed the eyes just listening to the music. I realized how it is always slightly changing but overall one could think its always the same tone if he doesnt listen closely. I was so deeply relaxed and only focused on one thing. the music. When the music ended everything was dead quiet. 3 o clock in the middle of the night.
I opened my eyes but didnt move. I wasnt even thinking. Just nothing. I heared the energy wires humming. My senses were all kinda sharpened. There was a little light from my soundsystem and it lit the whole room. A thought from the back of my brain came, like almost down my neck. I could cleary feel where it comes from because the mind was so quiet.
The humming from the energy wires i heared for the first time in my life. It took some time to figure what it was and then i decided to ignore and dont let my attention get away. I found a point of even deeper relaxation, it was like getting sucked through a whole. A tingeling feeling inside my stomache almost as if you are in a rollercoaster. I had a feeling like i am about to black out if i dont stop. A little panic came to my mind so i opened the eyes and the crossed legs a bit. At this point i had such a clear mind.
Now comes the part which is hard to believe and hard to prove and really always feels bad if it comes down to it. Cuz i understand that anybody who witnessed it will be able to understand. And probably not many who read this have.
but i to myself have proven it countless times this evening and from there on out:

I kind of visualized my rat getting up in the cage so i can observe it (in the back of my head like almost down the neck - 2 years later i found out there is a chakra called 'mouth of god').
I took my attention back and closed my eyes again. When i opened them the rat stood where i imagined it. This was odd but i didnt took it that serious yet. i started to try all kind of things, I seen a rat on yt eating off the old skin of its human, the rat seriously went to my feet starting to bite, but that was a little too deep and hurt. I switched the thoughts back to the forehead where we all think all kinds of things simoultanously which creates a storm of thoughts that suck our attention completely away and leaving us in a state of madness. And i realized the rats were not doing what i was thinking anymore. Rather they would run around headlessly or in chaos, just like our thoughts run. thus doesnt let us put all energy on one thought which would get enough energy to be forced to realize. We let fears and doubt rule the nature of our thoughts thus we cant accomplish what we want. Because we set our believe to we cant have it for whatever reasons. Even if we believe in something, we go tell other people and they put doubts in our mind.
If we want to have something we should not tell anybody about it. Just go and work for getting it.

I need a little break, i will be back later or tomorrow.
Questions and critique is highly appreciated!
Thanks for reading.
Cheers