Music Monday: Nirvana

ed here on this weekly post, I was in my 20s during the 1990s. And such, of course this band was huge for me. I'm not gonna pretend their first album was ever a part of my life, but their two studio albums and the Unplugged recording both played a huge part in the soundtrack of my life during that decade and since. It's Music Monday, and we're talking about Nirvana.

The story of Nirvana is a story of genius and tragedy, of a man beloved by the world who hated himself. It's a story of depression and rage. And I'm gonna say right here that the notion that artists should be miserable to be great is bullshit. Plenty of happy people make great art. But Kurt Cobain was able to distill his misery into brilliance in a way that moved a generation. I miss him, and wish he had been able to survive his story.

A note: As this is another band with a content rich youtube channel, I'll stick to songs available on that channel (with one exception). While this does lead to skipping some great songs, there's still more than enough here, I think.

Nevermind

The band's first hit single was inspired by the work of previous Music Monday subject The Pixies, and was written with the intent of becoming "the ultimate pop song." Which, I mean, it redefined both pop and rock, so mission accomplished. It is an anthem about apathy, a call to revolution, a paean to self loathing. It is one of the greatest rock songs of all time. It is Smells Like Teen Spirit:

Sample lyric:

Here we are now, entertain us
I feel stupid and contagious
Here we are now, entertain us

I'm going by album song order, so I'll go to the second song in the album despite it being only the fourth single. It is a song about the falseness of spring, about the ignorance of fans. It is gorgeous and dark. It is In Bloom:

Sample lyric:

He’s the one who likes all our pretty songs
And he likes to sing along
And he likes to shoot his gun
But he don't know what it means

The next song was planned to be the big hit single, and it maybe should have been? It is incredibly catchy. And it is here that I'll take a bit of time to mention that while Cobain is - justly - the main event and topic of any post about Nirvana, the other two guys were all time legends at their instruments. Specifically, Krist Novoselic's work on bass here is just amazing. This is Come As You Are:

Sample lyric:

Come as you are, as you were
As I want you to be
As a friend, as a friend
As an old enemy

I'm gonna tell y'all right here: The next song hurt my neck. And possibly my knees. Because, yeah, a younger me went down to the mosh pit and banged his head to this one more than once. This is a song about mental illness, specifically bi-polar disorder. It's about the ups and downs, and that is reflected by in the lyrics and the music. And, damn, this song is still so great. This is Lithium:

Sample lyric:

I'm so happy 'cause today I found my friends
They're in my head

The next song is deeply, deeply disturbing. It is a song about rape and abuse written from the point of view of the perpetrator, and was inspired by real life events. The contrast between the dark lyrics and the lovely melody is incredibly powerful. Cobain was active against rape and sexual assault, speaking up and performing in benefits. This is Polly:

Sample lyric:

Polly wants a cracker
I think I should get off her first
I think she wants some water
To put out the blow torch

In Utero

The band famously considered Nevermind to be "too polished," and Cobain hated being famous. So their next album - their last studio album, was intentionally rougher and coarser. The album's lead single was a song of love and hate both for Cobain's wife, the controversial Courtney Love. Love herself has tweeted that it is about her vagina. This is Heart Shaped Box:

Sample lyric:

She eyes me like a Pisces when I am weak
I've been locked inside your heart-shaped box for weeks
I've been drawn into your magnet tar pit trap
I wish I could eat your cancer when you turn black

In Nevermind, "Polly" was a song about rape from the rapists point of view. This song is the inversion of that, telling the story of a sexual assault from the point of view of the victim. It is super dark. This is Rape Me:

My favorite inside source
I'll kiss your open sores
I appreciate your concern
You're gonna sink and burn

The self loathing train continues with the next song, a song that is literally about drinking a toxic tea that used to be given to women to induce abortion, in order to get rid of the dark and hated parts of himself. This is Pennyroyal Tea:

Sample lyric:

I'm so tired I can't sleep
I'm a liar and a thief
Sit and drink pennyroyal tea
I'm anemic royalty

MTV Unplugged in NYC

In the mid 90s, these Unplugged shows were a huge hit, allowing loud band to perform quieter, more soulful versions of their hits. For Cobain, this was an opportunity to bare his soul. It was recorded just five months before his suicide, and in some ways serves just as much as a suicide note as the actual letter he left behind. In the biography Heavier Than Heaven, author Charles Cross reports that when Cobain asked for stargazer lilies, black candles, and a crystal chandelier, the producer asked if he meant like in a funeral, to which Cobain replied "Exactly. Like a funeral."

If you haven't seen the performance, I strongly recommend looking it up. A simple google search will lead you to a full version. Here, I'll have the samples available on the official youtube channel plus, as previously stated, one more.

We'll start with the performance's opening song, taken from the band's debut album, Bleach. It's about being with a girlfriend who's often too busy to spend time with him. This is About A Girl:

I'll take advantage while
You hang me out to dry
But I can't see you every night
No I can't see you every night ... free

The show had a bunch of cover songs, most by artists and bands far less famous than Nirvana. This is the exception, as it is a David Bowie song. It is a song about a man meeting his own doppelganger, the titular Man Who Sold The World:

I gazed a gazeless stare
At all the millions here
I must have died alone
A long, long time ago

The next song, the penultimate one of the performance, is a song from In Utero, that is performed much more powerfully here, to my mind. It is a song about depression. It is a song about death. This is All Apologies:

Sample lyric:

What else could I write?
I don't have the right
What else should I be?
All apologies

The performance's final song is not available on the official youtube channel, but I can't skip it. It is, to my mind, one of the greatest cover performances of all time, covering a song made famous - though not written by, as Cobain erroneously says on the recording - by folk and blues performer Lead Belly. The lyrics are dark, but the performance is darker. This is a man bleeding on a stage, while singing, screaming, and playing guitar. A beautiful man, suffering from drug withdrawal and sharing his pain. It is, I have long believed, the song he meant as a final statement of art. This is Tell Me Where Did You Sleep Last Night:

Sample lyric:

My girl, my girl, don't lie to me
Tell me where did you sleep last night
In the pines, in the pines
Where the sun don't ever shine
I would shiver the whole night through

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