Is Dark Phoenix worth your time?
No!
Hell no!
Oh my gosh no!
One thousand times no!
For the love of all that is holy no!
Dark Phoenix is one of the worst movies I have ever seen. But because I have been taught to always try to find the positive in everything, I will say one nice thing. The movie was (mercifully) relatively short. That is all. That is seriously the only positive I can think of. The movie is so boring and lazy that it is not even fun to rip on. At least Batman v Superman has provided me with endless "Martha" jokes and a drinking game that revolves around taking a drink every time someone asks "Why did that happen?" and the answer is "I don't know".
Conversely, Dark Phoenix has given me absolutely nothing.
That is not a dead Jean Grey. It is the hopes and dreams of X-Men fans who foolishly thought this movie would be watchable.
Please do not bother ever seeing this movie. Don't even bother renting it or watching it on HBO for free. It is simply not worth your time.
I actually feel insulted by "writer/director" Simon Kinberg. I had to use quotes because I simply do not believe he did any writing or directing. It seemed like he just took out some X-Men comic books, pointed to a few pages and said "do that... but don't put too much effort into it". There is no reason why. There is no real story development. There is no emotion. Worst of all, there is almost no action.
If he had pointed to some pages that had epic battles going on, it would have at least provided a little eye candy and popcorn-chomping motivation. But he didn't. He pointed to a lot of pages that involved talking about... nothing. That is fine for a 22 minute Seinfeld episode, but I prefer a better story if I am spending $10 and two hours of my time.
During the very few action sequences (I'd estimate less than 10 minutes of screen time) the choreography is so terrible that it reminds me of an amateur theater group who just took a three hour stage fighter course and want to show off their amazing new moves. There is nothing original or exciting in the battles.
When there is no action (which is the vast majority of the time) there is... nothing. Seriously. Because my wife and daughter are far wiser than my son and I, they did not go to the movie. When we returned home, the ladies asked me if it was good. Ummmmm no. Then they asked, "Who was the bad guy?". I did not know what to say. I don't really know (or care) who the bad guys were. All I came up with was "They are aliens. And Aliens are bad... I think." Then they asked for a huge spoiler, "Did Jean Grey live?" I can honestly say that my answer is not a spoiler because that answer is... "I don't know and I don't care."
In fact, I care so little that I'm not even going to finish writi...
Please don't waste your time on this movie.
Hahaha lol what a funny review man regarding this movie. But i am the fan of xman series i think i will go with family to watch this movie. 👍
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Haha that bad, huh?
Worse lol
Good to know. The previews just didn't grab me. I even had a chance to see it last weekend and passed.
I've been a huge X-Men fan ever since I saw the first movie back in 2000. They were always a lot of fun to watch. Thanks for warning me off of this mess. It's sad to think that this is what the series has come to.
I actually enjoyed all of them except X-Men 3. I didn't even mind Apocalypse. But this was just so lazy. Its like they felt making ti was a chore to get out of the way.
It doesn't even meet 1/4 of my expectations.
I was actually looking forward to this... I was very wrong.
So, you are saying you didn't like it. :)
You are very good at reading! ;)
Xmen has always been a hit or miss for me. No consistency in story, characters and plot.
Apocalypse was a car crash of a movie and your review of this latest once comes as little surprise to me.
The disrespect to the characters is what gets me...respect the original content! Cyclops gets no love and is always just another body in every xmen film and no way in hell should mystique be some kind of anti-hero / leader!
Days of future past and of course Logan if you even count it as part of the franchise are the only recent shining lights.
I think I’ll take you advice and not watch this movie, I have a sneaky feeling I won’t miss out on much...
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Logan is one of the best movies I have ever seen. It was written by the same guy who wrote this garbage. I simply can't believe it. To put things in perspective, Apocalypse was a masterpiece compared to this garbage.
I completely agree Logan is one of my all time favouetie films. Didn't now that??...well that is a head scratcher! Apocalypse and masterpiece should never be in the same sentence😄
At least you get to see Sophie Turner 😉
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Ouch!!!
That's a painful review
I watched it!! I did doze of somewhere in the middle (but I have done that for most movies)
But I didn't think it was this bad... hahahaha
Your review though is the bomb!!!!
Made me LOL :D
It's a superhero movie for little girls.
I really don't think that was the problem. The problem was the writing, directing, acting, lack of action, lack of any Easter eggs at all...
It was a superhero for no one.