Before Motivation, Find Meaning

in #motivation7 years ago (edited)

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Not too long ago, I happened to stumble across a 12-minute TED video titled, "There's more to life than being happy."

I found that title rather curious, because, as the speaker of the video, Emily Esfahani Smith, said, "I used to think the whole purpose of life was pursuing happiness."

I had some time to spare, so I watched.


The video is of a TED talk given by Emily Esfahani Smith, author of The Power of Meaning. At the beginning of the video, she talked about how elusive happiness can be if we try to chase it, that "chasing happiness can make people unhappy."

I can write at length about the many ways people try to chase happiness, but the essence of what I understand is that happiness without meaning isn't lasting happiness.

So, What is Meaning, Then?

Smith goes on to quote Martin Seligman: "Meaning comes from belonging to, and serving something beyond yourself, and from developing the best within you."

The 4 Pillars of a Meaningful Life

At roughly 2:49 into the video, Smith mentions 4 pillars of a meaningful life. These are:

  1. Belonging
  2. Purpose
  3. Transcendance
  4. Storytelling

Any non-attruibuted quotes below are from Smith's talk.

Smith takes the effort to emphasize that belonging has to do with being valued for who you are intrinsically, not just what you believe or who you hate.

Purpose is about what you give. "It's about using your strenths to serve others."

Transcendence is a state where you "feel conected to a higher reality."

Storytelling has to do with "the story you tell yourself about youself." It has to do with narrative you've weaved from the facts of your life.

I don't think all four of these have to be equally present for one to feel meaningful, however, if they all are somewhat present, I think you'll have a solid foundation.

As a side note, a lot of what follows is not necessarily from Smith's talk, but more my own thoughts and feedback on the matter.

What's The Difference Between Purpose and Meaning?

If you read some self-development material, you might see the words, purpose and meaning used closely together. "A sense of purpose and meaning" is one phrase that comes to mind.

But, it helps to define these two differently.

For me, the word meaning is a bit difficult to define, but I think it's closely aligned with one's values. And if you think about it, I think you'll agree: if you find something meaningful, it usually resonates with something that you value.

Meaning has to do with what one finds...meaningful. (Sorry for the circular definition.)

Allow me a second attempt: without meaning, life will seem...meaningless. (Still a circular definition of sorts.)

I'd say it's why the meaningless pursuit of happiness renders any so-called happiness—if happiness is even found—fleeting and empty.

As for purpose, if meaning has to do with what, then I'd say purpose has to do with how.

So, what comes first, meaning, or purpose?

Meaning—or what one finds meaningful—can help one find purpose. That is, if one finds something meaningful, then one's purpose is a method of enhancing that meaning.

So, my inclination is to say that meaning comes first. However, as I think about it some more, one could say that if one has a sense of purpose, then meaning is not far away.

Takeaways: How to Discover What's Meaningful to You

  1. What do you like to do, or feel compelled to do, even if it doesn't make you happy?

    This can't be something you feel obligated to do. I'm not talking about the mundane, tasks you don't find meaning in. I'm talking about something you authentically—without external influencers—want to do, and most likely do out of your own free will.

  2. What do people compliment you on?

    If people compliment you on something that you find easy to do, then you may have a natural talent in that area. Are you able to develop that talent and use it in the service of something bigger than—or outside of—yourself?

  3. What injustice or imbalance do you feel strongly about?

    Is there something in yourself, your life, your place of work, your community, or even the world that you feel could be made better?

    Do you have an idea that can make wait times shorter?

    Have you seen something wrong and wanted to speak up about it—or, even better, do something about it?

    Part of the proposed definition of meaning has to do with being involved in something "beyond oneself," so I would encourage you to think big.

    For example, can the new technology you're working on be applied in other areas?

    Can you build a worldwide, blockchain-based charity that sends funds directly to those who need them, without the large transaction fees that may come with fiat currencies?

    So, What About Motivation? Where Does That Come In?

    I'm glad you asked.

    Have you ever notied that, when you have a true sense of meaning about something, you don't need to "get motivated"?

    When something is big enough for you, when it really means something, you do it. Even if you don't "feel motivated" to do it, you'll still do it.

    And to that, I'd add that meaning sustains inspiration. You might feel inspired to do something, but it's meaning and persistence that keep you going.

    In conclusion, I hope you've found this post rather thought-provoking, and hopefully insightful.

    Attribution: image created for free in Canva.

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Maybe I have been doing life all wrong. I am constantly in search of true happiness. I mean, I love my family and my husband and boys do make me happy, but I often feel unfulfilled with my own personal experiences. I should focus more on meaning and motivation and less on the term "happiness". Thank you for this article, it really has me thinking and evaluating!

I'm really glad this has been of help to you.

The pursuit of happiness, hmmm. many times I believe I will be happy just when I get over there, I get miserable pursuing I forget to be happy right now. awesome post, it really inspired me thanks

Honestly, I've been having this deep conversation with myself lately. I can't seem to find what I am good at or what gives me happiness. I feel like we all chase what we call financial freedom because it affords us the happiness we are seeking which is the freedom to do whatever it is we want to do without worrying about the bills getting paid. However, I've been told numerous times when you serve others then the money follows because you are doing something "beyond yourself". Very thought provoking article.

Yes, I've also heard the mantra that when you serve others, then the money follows.

I'm not sure how I feel about that.

In a karmic sense, yes, it does work, but I can recall two specific cases where I had "business partners" with whom that did not work. That is, I didn't feel I got paid directly for my efforts.

But then again, I did learn some fundamental skills about business and people in general, and a few years later, I went on to do very well, so in a more indirect sense, I guess I did gain from it.

It's a big subject, though. I would say that the best way to do it is to serve others without any attachment to what's in it for you.

The title itself is thought provoking. Kudos for that.
This is making me refer back to the posts I wrote yesterday. Our ideas here are similar. You have however given me a different lance to examine purpose, meaning and motivation and how they are intertwined.

This line is what gave me that uh huh moment "I'd say it's why the meaningless pursuit of happiness renders any so-called happiness—if happiness is even found—fleeting and empty." This is so profound. The mistake we all make is believing that once we've attained this and bought that and got there that we'll be happy. But what's the purpose of us wanting to get there? What's the meaning of those goals to us?

If we keep chasing happiness, we are absent in the present and run by things that could have added meaning; that could have given us purpose. But we missed them ass we were running, chasing after happiness.

Yes, we have similar lines of thought, even if we have slightly different perspectives.

I'm glad you received an uh-huh moment from what I wrote. If everyone who reads my writing recieves that type of epiphany, I'll be very happy.

The way you outline everything is quite well thought out, well written. I admire writing skills. I will be as good as you are one day.

Thanks! As you do with your poetry, I put a lot of thought into my posts, and try to structure them in a way that moves the argument forward.

Excellent. i'm inspired.

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