Great topic here, and I like what you pointed out.
Personally I can say that I've found a good thing to pursue balance in looking for other's approval.
Balance in caring or not. Since there where a period where I had the attitude to not care very much and I felt good, I felt in control for a while. Then I realized that if you completely don't think about the others perspective you may end up hurting someone, or even yourself. So I thnk caring the right way may disturb yourself sometimes but it gives you a protection, not to end up completely alone and from hurting yourself since sometimes what it looks right to you may not be right at all! Of course I try not to care that much in other's oppinion when the things are secondary and I try to accept what the people may think about me since I can't control it.
I think it's important to be balanced even when you have to choose who's oppinion is important in your life. Sometimes I found myself caring to much of people not having my good in mind, and vice versa!
To me is a continuos effort to find balance