Distance Away From My Past, But The Memories Still Hunts Me Like They Where Closer Than My Shadows - Maybe I Could Never Escape From This Tedious Memories

Maybe I didn't run enough?, oh!? no, I actually did. I kept thousands of light years between us, but still, you feel closer than my Shadows. How else would I run?, what distance should I keep between us?, to be free from you. Why you hunt me so badly?, why you torment me of bad reminisce?, what have I done to deserve this?

That's me to my memories. I have lived some memories I wouldn't like to see again, inasmuch it is entangled with memories I will like to foretell. I have but always try to isolate the good memories from the bad ones, but came to realize it look just like moving a mountain. It is a past I never needed in the present but appears to me even more than the needed. Aww! this is becoming unbearable, it kills my moral. All it ever does is to harm my present, maybe even make my future prone. Oh! no, "I am not going to allow you", maybe this time I am going to fly farther or maybe I might go too far to erase my entire memories and avoid you forever. Yes I know, I have a lot to loose, and I might regret later, but maybe that could be my only way to erase you forever and learn to live without a single knowledge of my past.

Goodness!, sorry I got lost in my writings. I plead, because my emotions have taken total control of me. Maybe this is bringing my blood into my ink. But, pardon me cause this memories have begin to drown me in fear. It seems just like they are on a mission to keep me in depression. They have totally blind me of my good memories, as those appears to me like a mirage, whereas they appear to me even closer than my own skin. I seek a lot of fun even here on steemit in order to submerge them, but it looks as if they are waiting outside my doors in every moment, waiting for me to have little fun, then there they come with all of their torturing instruments, trying to make my life a living hell.

image credit

What else can I do to keep them away?, maybe I am meant to leave with them, maybe I have to build a strong spirit to fight them or maybe there is a way I can dominate the good memories over the bad ones. Maybe my first option will serve best, that is, erasing my entire memories.

Bad memories will play the most often, but just because the memory comes up doesn't mean you have to watch it, "CHANGE THE CHANNEL."

                                                        ~Joel Osteen

I think I would take up little motivation/advice from Joel Osteen and try to force change the channel to the good memories, but would it be that easy. Can those memories easy to change?, can I put them away?. I think they can't so easily, because I have tried more harder. I think the fact lies in the quote from Thinkpozitive.com

Some memories never leave your bones like salt in the sea; they become part of you and you carry them.

Maybe I have to carry them along and learn to leave with them. Maybe running away should never had been my option. Maybe moving closer to them might help me become stronger, though it hit so badly. Or maybe it torments me because I am never ready to unravel them

Guess I might have to look for a better option or probably you, reading might have a panacea to this unfading memories.....

Thanks for reading, your comments will be appreciated

@alumhydro