Meditation tutorial

I know some of my followers have a new found desire for meditation I have spoken to several who have dabbled in it some who are more experienced & some that would like to learn how to. So with 40+ years of experience & a bit of instruction under my belt & as promised here is my tutorial.
I stumbled across meditation by accident in my life, nobody taught me how to do it, I didn't know I could do it or what it was until many years after my first experience with it. I was a young child & I simply fell into a trance state while sitting on the floor. something must have distracted me from playing & obviously my mind must have emptied & I was deep in meditation without any explanation & it felt very nice indeed, I cant remember how long I was under I can tell you it was strong & how it felt, it was a pure adrenaline rush that engulfed my whole self head to toe when it was over I never gave it another thought & carried on with my day, it felt unique & solitary so I kept it to myself. Little did I know that I would be teaching people to do it when I was a grown up or what benefits it had. I certainly couldn't of foreseen me writing about the experience & publishing it to the whole world but I just have.

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Are you sitting comfortably the above position is the optimum position for meditation & so say all the experts. I will just add here that if you think meditation doesn't work or that you will never be able to do it then you are quite right & you may as well move on now it will never work for anybody that doesn't believe in it accept my kind greeting & go & find a post that interests you more. For all you open minded folk I shall continue, You have to be comfortable if you are sat there rigid stiff & it hurts then you need to move, It's only the optimum position not the only position, you need no arms & legs to achieve success there are amputees that have mastered the art if it's not possible to sit cross legged comfortably then don't, lay flat on your back instead or sit in any way that makes you feel comfortable. Relaxing is far more important than position, I am trying to get you in a trance state not in traction.

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Put the back of your hands on your legs as shown in above picture, not your wrists not your knuckles the back of your hands just as shown, If you are laying flat on your back then copy the pose in the picture shown, remember comfort is paramount. The next step is to regulate your heart rate & breathing rate the aim here is to slow your heart rate down, as a bonus this will also reduce your blood pressure & if you suffer with anxiety or depression this part of the exercise alone will be of benefit to you. This is called the 4-7-8 method & it refers to the amount of seconds in the breathing technique, you can also use this to cure insomnia it will make you sleep like a bug in a rug,
I need you to place the tip of your tongue behind your front 2 top teeth, right where your teeth meet your gums, if you have no teeth then on the bottom of your gums & remember 4-7-8, The first number is 4 so this needs to take 4 seconds look at a clock if need be or count, its an inward breath through your nose with your tongue still behind teeth open your diaphragm & breath slowly in through your nose, Practice this until you get it right 4 seconds to fill your lungs. Remember 4-7-8 we have mastered the first 4 inward breath now for the 7, we are going to hold our breath for 7 seconds, 4 seconds in hold it for 7 keeping your tongue in the same position & then exhale for 8 seconds, (4 in 7 hold 8 out) your mouth should be slightly open, repeat this 6 times or as many times as necessary until you are relaxed & your heart rate has slowed. breath in for 4 secs hold for 7 secs exhale for 8 secs, magic you will be relaxed in no time.

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You are now moments from magical success & spiritual enlightenment you should be in a very relaxed state & in a comfortable position & we can work on the last part which is the bit that most find the most difficult but you have an advantage over them because the majority of them will not have used the 4-7-8 breathing exercises to be in the relaxed position you are in now, most in fact will have just sat cross legged on the floor for 5 minutes & packed up when their impending failure came to fruition. You however have sat or laid comfortably, controlled your breathing & heart rate & had the self belief to begin with, otherwise you wouldn't still be reading.
Next you have to clear your mind.

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How can anyone clear their mind so it's completely devoid of all thought? Thoughts pop into our minds at a lightning speed, they are just that in fact small electrical charges flowing through a water based brain & they are a constant distraction not only on meditation but sleep patterns, they can get in the way of any routine that you implement into your life with alarming regularity if you let them. As soon as you get rid of one thought another one will take its place they will keep popping up to infinity.

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The answer is you cant stop them unless you die, your brain cannot switch off but it can be tricked or deceived into thinking just about anything with enough preparation, just think of the stupidest thing you ever heard there's a good chance the person who told you actually believed it or they were duped into believing it. That's what we are going to do next create a diversion in your mind, it's not as hard as it sounds we have all been tricked in our lives this time we are going to do it to ourselves, rather than have a mind full of thoughts multiple we are going to replace them with a singular.

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Don't worry if you don't have a sunflower handy I was just using that as an example & I like sunflowers they are groovy, You can use any object at all something that you can concentrate on, if your outside it can be a rock or a tree if you are home it can be anything, place it in front of you & stare at it, If you are laying down facing the ceiling then use something on the ceiling like a smoke alarm or lighting fixture. If you are cross legged a candle works well for me & I will use candle for this example. Just stare at it and think of it & think the word to yourself repetitively candle candle candle candle candle, Make it so the candle is the only thing in your mind just think candle.

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Now you are relaxed, you are comfortable, your breathing is relaxed, your heart rate is reduced, your blood pressure has fallen, your anxiety is lowered & you only have one single thing on your mind a candle, if you sat for 5 minutes just like this it would do you the power of good but we want to be in a trance so we have only one step left, forget the candle.
Go ahead forget the candle.

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That's it you should be in a trance state if you have got it right you will feel a little rush of energy at the base of your spine or on your head, if you are rushing more even better, if you are engulfed in a rush sit there & enjoy it that's as good as it gets. If you have sat there & nothing has happened for 10 minutes after you forgot the candle then don't worry read my guide again & try again tomorrow. If it doesn't work on day one after 15 minutes it probably wont work today it could be any of the steps that you didn't get quite right or you just had too much stress to clear, it wasn't because you cant do it you were just unsuccessful on your first attempt it will work sooner or later just keep trying. 15 minutes 3 or 4 times a week. As your practice & success level increases you will notice that time speeds up when you are under sometimes I think Ive been under for 20 minutes & an hour has passed so just be careful that it doesn't make you late for appointments etc. Other than that it's just something to enjoy I haven't had any negative experiences it can cure things of that I'm sure it certainly reduces anxiety, stress, blood pressure, It should reduce the likelihood of stroke & coronary. Always consult a doctor if you experience any discomfort I don't advocate it as an emergency treatment or suggest that it should replace surgery.
Thanks for reading.