WHOSE JOB IS IT TO COOK AND ENSURE CLEANLINESS IN THE HOME?

I laugh most times when I see singles on social media especially girls, saying they won't cook or clean because they are not slaves to men and also, some misguided boys (yes, boys) saying cooking and cleaning are exclusively a woman's job.

My preference as man though is this, I cannot marry a woman who doesn't understand the need to take charge of the home logistics, cook sumptuous meals and keep the home in good sanitary conditions. But I'm not of the school of thought that says it's just the woman's cup of tea to do all those. It is a shared responsibility. Let me ask. After having sex, do you wait for your wife to go wash your genitals for you?

A man's job as a husband and possibly a father, goes beyond providing money. You must see to the overall wellbeing of the family-be it health, hygiene, security, safety, economic, social, educational, moral, etc. If your house is akin to a piggery, the man as well as the woman, is a monumental failure.

Bringing up such a topic reeks of immaturity and a severe lack of information on the dynamics of marriage. When boys and girls talk, yes they can conjure such frivolities but not for adults. Marriage is a serious business and I haven't seen a married couple bicker or fight over whose turn it is to cook and clean. You don't go into a marriage to brandish egos. It is a place of humility and dedication to the happiness of your spouse.

When you tie the proverbial knot, a whole new vista is opened. The man and the woman are faced with new challenges that singles have absolutely no idea about. They need to plan their finances, careers, education, business, investments, family size and the most important task of bringing up decent kids, insurance, accommodation, relations/communications/dealings with friends and extended family etc.

Traditionally, women have been fully responsible for the most noble task of seeing to the nutritional needs, cleanliness and orderliness in the home. Try as a man could, he would never do it as good as the woman. Due to harsh economic realities and the quest for career pursuits, women are now venturing into fields and careers, to assist their husbands in providing finances for the smooth running of the home and a realization of personal goals. This however, has come with various negative side effects as both parents abandon the sacred duty of care and sound upbringing of their children.

Boys and girls are brought up nowadays to be conscious of their collective and personal hygiene. No man in his right senses would be comfortable lounging in a putrid and disorganized home whether married or not. If anyone isn't perturbed lounging in a shitty environment, patriarchy or feminism, isn't an escape route-you have a disgusting personality. When your baby messes up her nappies, thinking of who's responsibility it is to tidy her up, wouldn't be paramount at that point.

From childhood, we must bring up children (boys and girls alike) to learn how to prepare meals, flush the toilet and tidy it after use, do dishes after eating and be obsessed with personal and general cleanliness. When they get to the age of marriage, asking about who is going to be responsible for cleaning or cooking would become a stupid endeavor as it would be natural to both of them.

As a man, I prefer to give my wife the honor of cooking and feeding me and our children. Our lives are practically in her hands. If she permits, I will sometimes give her treats by preparing her favorite(boy, I'm an expert). I won't and can't wait for my wife to come back from wherever she maybe, before making my bed, washing dishes or stuffing up dirty clothes in the washing machine or putting the living room in order before visitors come perhaps unannounced.

Some men hiding under patriarchy would not lift a pin in the house because "its a woman's job to tidy the home". Bros, you are a pig. There's nothing in patriarchy that says a man should be ok with maggots growing in his boxers because it's his wife's duty to wash it. Likewise, any woman disguising as a feminist or hiding under feminism to glorify laziness, idiocy and crass character deficiencies, is nothing but a disgusting sloth. Absolutely no excuses!

Men and women owe themselves a duty of care, love and respect. When you have these, it becomes an extremely foolish venture, asking whose job it is to keep the home clean!