Marriage is equivalent exchange, but also resource integration
What is resource integration? Resource integration is the comprehensive rectification of a series of surrounding resources. The integration of resources in marriage is a means of a happy marriage, and it is also a goal that both spouses must achieve in the end. Using the idea of resource integration to manage our daily lives, there are advances and retreats, choices and trade-offs, and relaxation, we can obtain the optimal allocation of family life resources, so that couples' lives will always be fresh and nutritious.
What is equivalent exchange? Love is single-minded, and even more exclusive, and harmonious love must be exchanged at equal value. The so-called equivalence means that the value of both parties must be equal, and what everyone pays and what they get must be balanced. In a complex world, equivalent exchange will not exist in every occasion of life, but both spouses in marriage should try to maintain the equality of love.
When we have tasted the sweetness of love, we take it for granted that love is the promise of each other, and the exchange of the value of the same amount of love for each other's love; when we undergo the baptism of marriage, each other becomes mature and stable And when facing life calmly, we will feel that the original love has lost its vividness to a large extent, and what comes with it should be the sharing of responsibilities.
Probably because of the person's own sake, in a passionate relationship, the giving of the two sides of the affection is often not equivalent, usually manifested in the enthusiastic chasing of the giving party to the enjoyment party. Under normal circumstances, it is the chasing of the male to the female. The enthusiasm continued to talk about marriage and marriage. But once the marriage contract is reached, a series of changes will take place on both sides, especially when the wife will discover the behavior that the husband has never done during the love phase, that is, the nature of a man gradually manifests. At this time, the wife will undergo a series of psychological changes. Therefore, the wife should prepare for the first stage of the marriage. Of course, this does not mean that men are hypocritical, but that wives should realize that this kind of change in husbands is a common phenomenon. Similarly, the husband will feel that his wife is not as gentle as before, and it seems that he is not as considerate of himself as before, and even becomes slutty in front of him. At this time, the husband must also pay attention, not that the wife is not gentle, but when the fire of love burns under the eaves of the marriage, the object has become a wife, and she has appeared in front of you as a family member. Therefore, husbands should tolerate their wives, and they should be aware that changes in wives in marriage are also a common phenomenon.
Because when the marriage contract has not been reached, both parties will consider each other’s sake and regard each other’s feelings as more important than anything else, even higher than their own lives, so that they will try their best to show their strengths in front of each other. , To hide their shortcomings. But once they get married, each other will relax and slack off the pre-marriage performance and hiding. Both parties will feel that the most difficult battle is over, and each other will regard their own feelings more importantly than the other, and strictly demand The other party repays his efforts, so it is inevitable that he often criticizes the other party.
Both spouses in a marriage, especially when they are just married, mostly hope that each other can live according to their own habits and design various lifestyles for each other, and they believe that such a design is correct. However, there are no two people who are exactly the same in the world, and you cannot ask all people to live your way. Because, no matter how perfect a person's lifestyle is, it is definitely not a consistent truth. However, the first married couple often ignores this point.