The perfect first date: What it should look like

I just saw a gold digger prank on YouTube.

Basically to summarize the video for you. A woman sitting on a bench is approached by a deaf guy. The guy starts a conversation on a piece of paper. He Asks her out on a date and she refuses. Then his assistant comes and the woman on the bench finds out that the deaf guy actually has a lot of money. Immediately the woman's attitude towards the guy changes and she actually phoned a friend insulting the man saying how she is going to go out with him just because he has money.

This video made me think:
I am so glad I met my Girlfriend when I had nothing.

I admit, there are decent girls in this world. Just like there are decent guys. This however is not the norm. In a date, girls normally ask the question: "What do you do for a living". In some ways, this is the guy's chance. The getting to know you part of the date is often where a woman determines whether a guy is any good. This is often biased by financial stature. In the same way a guy's opinion of a girl is often biased by physical attraction. Many guys and girls do this without even realizing it.

I have experienced this in life with other relationships as well. Someone has almost no interest in me. Finds out I am successful and suddenly we can be "friends". A guy would normally stick with an attractive girl with a rotten attitude. A girl would normally stick with a rich successful guy with a rotten attitude.

This is one of the large pitfalls in relationships. Girls over sell their bodies. Guys over sell their success.

What the perfect date should look like:
This will make some cringe, because it goes against everything that society wants to teach the masses. A perfect date is all about refusing the other side what they want most. Instead of using it as bait.

You see both genders are generally shallow. It just takes on different forms.

For a guy
Most girls will assess a guy by their financial success in life. Therefor a guy should not talk about financial success in life. This includes boasting about a resume. If a girl knows a guy is the CEO of a company. They would probably fill in the blanks.

You want the girl to be more focused on who you are, than what you can provide her in a long term relationship. You do not want to only be a girl's meal ticket. You do not want a girls first impression of you to be, he is rich, my troubles are over. You really want a girl to start liking you for who you are.

For a girl
Most guys will assess a girl by physical appearance. Therefor a girl should be modestly dressed. A girl should be covered up. Not the definition of what they believe is acceptable, or what the world sees as acceptable. You have to cover up head to toe if you can. It is really in a girls best interest to cover up.

You want a guy to have learned some thing about you. You want a guy to like you for who you are. You do not want a guy's best and almost only impression of the night to be: "She has nice boobs". Not because you were flashing them in his face the whole night.

In the same way I would say you should not spend too much time on makeup. Try and be as real and natural as possible. You want to take a guy's focus away from how beautiful you are and direct it to who you are. You can show off later.

At the end of a date you want to have made a new friend

If a person does not want to like you under these terms, you're probably better off without them.

A girl will have plenty of opportunity to show off their beauty. A guy will have plenty of opportunity to show off their success, to show off their resume. These are important. They should not be neglected by either parties. A guy should be able to look after a girl financially (Though I feel a girl needs to be able to look after herself first). And a girl should spend time on her physical appearance for their partner, A guy should as well.

These things however should not form the basis of a relationship. The basis of a relationship should be a person's character. Who they are. A form of friendship and mutual interest in life.

To me that is what the perfect first date should look like. Maybe even the first five. This way you have a far higher chance to attract a partner who will stand by you no matter what. Who will not leave you for a younger partner when you age and your beauty fades. A partner that will stand by you when you lose your job.