Finding your Edges / Creating Boundaries

Finding your Edge

Edges, we all have them.
Some of us just have softened ours so much that it barely feels like we have any at all.
But if you look closer, they're there.

Edges are our boundaries.
The line in which we don't let the things that fall below our level of standards or values cross.

But over time, we slowly let a few slip by.

Because why?
Because we think we have to, to be "nice"
We think if we have standards or boundaries that we will isolate and abandon ourselves.

How many times have you been told growing up to "just be nice"?

Or

"If you cant say anything nice.. dont say anything at all"

Which leads to not saying much since everyone has their own idea of what "nice" really is and basically you just become a walking talking fascimilie of everyone else who has lost their own edge an doesnt know how to speak for themselves or assert their worth or get what they want from life, because it isn't "nice".

When we lose our edge, we also lose our balance

Falling for just about everything and standing for just about nothing

It's like living in a house with no walls.
Where is the protection, where is the boundary line, where is the limit?

Without edges and boundaries we allow ourselves to be exposed to elements our soul doesn't agree with but we feel like we are subject to no matter what, like we don't have a choice.

Maybe you want to be nice and allow everyone in because your heart is big and kind and loving.

But where does that get you?

There are billions of people in the world and shit ton of energy and if you soften your edge for every single one, you will find yourself broken down, depleted and completely taken advantage of.

You can love and accept people without allowing them all in.

I used to think it wasn't spiritual or kind to have edges, boundaries, rules, limitations, standards.

I thought if I set standards it meant that I thought I was above other people and equality is a gigantic value to me.

But I learned that by NOT having these standards I fell massively below my own threshold for other peope's energy and behaviour and that made me feel completely inferior to people and to life.

I didn't stand for much and I allowed everyone's energy into my space and it drained me to the point of mental and emotional exhaustion.
It took the life force out of me.
How nice is that?

We aren't meant to be welcome mats, walked all over or drained of our life force because it's the nice thing to do.

Everyone has edges, darkness, standards and we are allowed to assert ours.

When you don't hold your boundaries sacred and in high regard you are doing yourself and others a disservice and that is what is not spiritual.

It is kind to yourself and to others to know and uphold your standards. This will encourage and inspire others to then know and uphold their own, and what could be more spiritual than teaching others to know themselves better.

Being spiritual and kind and conscious means knowing your own boundaries and standards and values and living them.

You didn't come here to appease anyone, you came for your souls evolution and by not having boundaries you will feel lost and consumed by the world more often than not.

How to set your boundaries?
Know your feelings.
Know your emotions.
Know your soul.
Know your values.
Know your standards.

These are all guides helping you to be the most effective and alive version of you.

Find your edges and be selective in who and what you allow to cross them. XO