how to wake up a woman

you pull gently the hair
of the rocker that listens to metal
at midnight
and smash his head
all over the walls

you grab kindly the hand
of the old lady
who listens loudly the news
at 5 AM in the morning
although they will be retransmitted
at 7 AM
and throw her out the window

you take the leg
of the neighbor that drills holes
in the wall at 10 PM
and spin him around
so that the borer
would go right by his ears

and after
there isn't anything else
that could wake her up
beside you
you kiss her on the shoulder