The shouts...In the Life: Domestic Violence Survivor Story cont'd.

What a great night of rest and sleep without tears, shame, and fear!

I forgot what it was like to sleep peacefully. For the first time in a long while, I went to school in the morning feeling like I was on cloud nine. I was able to embrace the cold breeze in that morning spring and .... smile. I smiled. I smiled at the trees, at my neighbors, at my friends, my colleagues and teachers and every little thing I saw. This was something different as I usually would look away from people...from the world.

I treasure this moment like it was my last. I interacted with folks I shut out for a long time. And I finally got to say "Hi" to my friend that I cast away who I was trying to protect from. We started talking that whole day again. It was like starting all over again. Butterflies in my tummy appeared and I forgot how good that felt. To just feel being 'loved'.

My friend and I hung out all day! It was amazing! I didn't care if people who knew my crazy ex boyfriend at the time thought when they saw me hanging out with my friend at school. I see their stares and all I could do was shrug my shoulders. I was happy. I was done hiding.

My happy day came to an end too soon. He appeared at my school unexpectedly. Something I never thought he would do.

My friend and I were still having a fun conversation on campus when he appeared, looking right at us my our eyes...furious at what he just saw.

I stood still...still as a statue..not knowing what to do. Do I go out there where he was or do I stay put and hold my ground?

You bet! I stood still. I dared not move from where I was standing with my friend. He walked away after seeing what happened. I thought he left for good.

He came back to peek a second time at my conversation with my friend. Again, I stood still. He rolled his eyes at me to follow him. I was confused at what he wanted and what he was going to do. I quietly step aside from my friend to the corner to see what he wanted. I thought I was in a safe area because we were still on school grounds. Teachers and other students were still around. We weren't alone.

But he dared made a scene anyway. His eyes were grunted and his lips knitted closely tight together as if he were about to hit someone. And...he shouted very loud at me in front of everyone as if no one was there. I didn't pay attention to what he was saying to me because I was more worried about what others around me would think and what they may see. I remember the words coming from his mouth was the usual hateful words he always used. His inappropriate shouts didn't end.

It took a teacher to come out from a classroom to kindly as him to leave. Even then, he yelled at the teacher inappropriately. I had to take away. I dragged him from all that scene where everyone was staring. I was embarrassed.

The girl who showed up at school all cheerful and ready to start the day ended up being the one everyone looked at as "the girl with all the problems."

I told him I would leave with him if he just stopped and followed me. I never went back to say "bye" or "I'm sorry" to my friend. I just left him there and I didn't want him to think I left without saying anything even though he heard and saw everything.

While dragging him away from my school campus, he wouldn't stop the shouting and continued. It was the most embarrassing moment for me as a student and seeing how others viewed me.