Is love and lust for personal appropriation mutually wrong?

In life, every human being has, and will experience, a psychological state, love. I want to ask those who are and have loved that: with you, what is love? How do you love your lover? What do you want from your lover?

For me personally, love is a non-shaping thing, it is a particular emotion of one person to one person. When I first fell in love, I always remembered and had a lot to say when she was not around. But when she was with me, all the words I wanted to say to her vanished. My feelings are full of satisfaction and do not seem to need anything anymore. I always try my best to be happy, what she wants that I can not bring to her, I always try to help her get the chance to get what she wants. One day, she said she did not want to be with me, I felt myself falling into the abyss, the gut, the liver was being ripped out by someone else. I really want to hold on, hold her tight and do not let go. But I still let go and support her without any attachment. Because I realized that if you try to hold on to something that is not there, it just makes you both suffer.

Anyway, only my suffering is enough, I do not want her suffering just like me. To me, her happiness is more important than my happiness. If I could not make her happy then I had to support her to find out where she belonged.

Recently, I read the newspaper, see the news that there are many assaults, the murder occurred very pitiful. The culprits and victims of these cases are often couples who love each other or the couple. When I read this news, I shuddered, horrified. I wondered: this is how they love each other? Can love be brutal and cruel? Is love and lust for personal appropriation confused?

image source: google search