Why do people, who I like, don't like me? (Often)

We often look for people who is +1 better than they are.
But we don't like people who worse than we are.

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Source of image - wikimedia.org

We often say that we need kind, beautiful, smart and active partner.
But everything goes with a dark side. In reality we want people like we are.

What does it mean 'kind'?
When we say this we mean our own level of kindness.

Majority of people don't want a woman/man who would speak with homeless people, invite them to home to get a shower, eat some food and sleep. Most of us don't have this level of love and kindness.

We are something in the middle, hence we need someone at the middle. But if you really one of those heroes, then you need look for a partner with this qualities.

Beautiful.

We don't need a partner who can easely get sex with someone else, or is always percived as a sexual object. It's dangerous. You always will be on a hot spot.

Smart.

We don't need a partner who is next level of smartness that we are. It's hurting when you understand that someone is smarter than you are. For smart people it may be boring to be around less wise and high IQ people.

Active.

We have different level of activity. Some people can handle 30 active hours per week, others can stand even 3 hr.

--- What is love? ---

Love is when two people as one.
Love is when two people have same goals.
He wants a baseball bat - you want to buy a baseball bat.
She wants a shampoo = He wants to buy a shampoo.

Remember your mother. If she is/was loving and caring then you can find in her behaviour this pattern. You wanted a transformer - she brought to you.

It's not only about stuff to buy, it's also about travel, lifestyle, a book to read, where to go at this evening. BUT, it is not a rule. She may be against something.

Also there is a component - you are never compare who you love with other men/women. Did you compare your mother or father to other people? Maybe, but you would never took this seriously, like "Yes, I will go now and find another mother/father"

If you start to compare your husband/wife then simply STOP. Seek good qualities, because you've chosen this man/woman, you might compare on the stage when you met, till marriage, but not now.

Stay long without sex, you need to understand a man/woman.

First thing to do is look at you.

Who are you? What do you want? What is your goals?
What do you manifest into future?(your dreams)

Nex thing to consider - goals.

Does she/he has same goals that you have?

Example: You wanna live in China, it's your goal for the next 5 year. Travel to your favorite China city. Live there a week, month, or how long visa can provide to you time. Then you would have more clean picture of your goal.
Do you like living in China?
Yes, then find a woman/man with same qualities in China. Cool, yes.

You wanna for example be Christian in China, and spread word of Christ, then find a church, Saturday is the biggest day for us, and you go there, pray, speak with people, be active and ... maybe you find her.

Yesterday I had interesting expiriace - I spoke with people. Most of them were women. How can you find a friend in church? Come to a man/woman and say that you have read in the Bible: "For where two or three gather together in My name, there am I with them.”

Then you said - would you mind to pray together?After praying you can ask some quastions about bible, life, sins, problems or whatever... then you can leave this person and when she/he leave the church you can ask overtake and continue conversation. Start with "You know, I like you, and I wanna find a woman/man who share with me same values..."

It's an example, you are likely have other values, and want something different. Ask a quastion about what your future is like, what do you want to be/get? Where could be people who want same things as I am? Find a partner who wants same things there.