He loves you

There comes a time in your life when everything just does not go the way you expected it to go and you'll question what's the point of all of this? You'll see only futility in trying for anything at all. Hope is fast diminishing, you'll forget what it feels like to be genuinely happy from within, you'll start to believe there is no sense in trying to be good.

Eventually believing that "everyone thinks I'm a horrible person, maybe they're right? So let's be that person and end everyone's misery. I'm not happy anyway, might as well make the ones who are trying to make me feel miserable, happy." You'll begin to believe the lies how there is no point. And you just give in.

This is a life lived without God.

Do you think He left you? He doesn't leave us. He never leaves us. We stray from Him. We push Him out of the picture when we start to choose the opposite of goodness. When we choose willfulness over willingness, He cannot reach us.

Because with genuine love, you don't force someone to choose. You give them space to make their own choices. To make the choice for themselves. You give them the freedom to choose. Even if it means having to live without them. This is love. This is what God afforded us when He gave us free will. He didn't create us so that we could love Him. No. He created us so that He could love us! And in love He can only be willing, never willful.

So even if He wanted to; intervene, desperately help, come to our rescue, (and He most definitely wants to, but) if we choose to keep doing wrong, He remains out of reach. But we are the only ones not letting Him in. Not anymore.

As long as we continue to keep choosing -
indifference over love;
selfishness over sacrifice;
escapism over legitimate suffering;
hostility over empathy;
contempt over forgiveness;
evil over goodness;
willfulness over willingness.
conscious or not, we have voluntarily locked Him out. And without Him and his grace, in the absence of His Love, a black hole.

Winsse