Fear of Love: The Worrying Sickness

 

Maybe I am too much of a realist, but being heartbroken may not be as bad as you think. The first feat is admitting that you love someone, to that person. And if that wasn't hard enough, you are ready to do what ever it takes to keep them in your life. You are now deeply emotionally devoted to someone that can break your heart into a million peaces and leave you scrambling to pick up the pieces. You put your trust in someone who can easily undo what your long relationship took to build. That person has the power to make you miserable. But why?

Why do we let that person control our pain? Because we have to? That's what heartbreak is? That's how love is undone?...Well yea. But don't be so pessimistic about it. Take control of your own emotions and reason through the pain with optimism. It might be that pessimism was the reason that it fell apart in the first place. Spend less time worrying about the possibility/actuality of it falling apart and more time thinking about the possibility of it working out or moving on. We let our emotions/irrationality get the best of us, I will admit that, but you have to be aware of it so that you and your partner can focus on progressing/fixing though your relationship, not dwelling and hanging back on the emotional plateau or fallout.

The thing I like about blogs is that it is raw thoughts and feelings on a "page". And maybe my thoughts are scattered and unorganized, but here is what to come away with all of this nonsense:

1. Heartbreak comes and leaves you in shambles because someone else put you there, (typically) so take control away from that person and give yourself the optimistic chance you deserve.

2. Don't be afraid to communicate your emotions, whether good or bad. It could save your relationship/marriage/friendship. You can always move on from heartbreak, but regrets for not saying something when you could have can haunt you longer and stop the process of moving on.

3. Don't live in fear that something may fail or not go as planned. Don't worry unless you have reason to. And if something must be done, don't half ass it, take charge and say or do what needs to be said or done.

4. Tips 1-3 are all easier said than done.