Toxic Relationships - " throwing salt to the wound" (Vol - 2)

benjaminpm96 (61)in #love • 8 years ago

In my point of view, we could say that after entering into a Toxic Relationship it is very likely that we end up being masochists! We know that we are not well personally but equally we follow... I do not say that we are weak for letting that happen, the truth in my opinion to go through this situation is not easy because you are in total controversy and something very confusing, and Makes it difficult to establish pros and cons. Most of the time you just let things happen and already, but you do not decide! That is the big problem.

There are a few reasons that regardless of whether we are aware or not, we continue "throwing salt to the wound" here I leave you some:

• Low Self-Esteem: We may be thinking that we aren't deserving of him / her. Something wrong of course!

• Superhero Feeling: We may be fantasizing about the idea that we were chosen to save that person from a final evil, trying to change her to as we would wish that she to be.

• The Victim: Maybe we are playing the role of victims. thinking who is going to love us more than he / she? If I am such a bad person and don't deserve anything, how can I leave this relationship with the luck I had to find someone who can stand me?

• Begging for love: When we don't manage us properly, we begin to think that we need him or her to overcome our affective deficiencies. (Like the story of my mother in Vol - 1).

• Loneliness: By the fear of feeling alone we can be able to tolerate anything.

• Zone of comfort or security: For fear of not knowing what the future prepares for us, we prefer to stay with what we have and we do not advance.

While it is true that a Toxic Relationship can leave you something destroyed, I don't think it will kill you! So, if you have already identified that you are in a Toxic Relationship, it is not the moment to keep quiet, or to look down, rather you should start working on your self-esteem and learn to communicate assertively, saying what you feel without aggressiveness and looking for that the other person understand you . Sit down to share with your partner what you feel and what you want the relationship to be, depending on what the conversations turn out you will notice if you want to follow or not. That yes, you must know and apply the fact that people do not change just because we tell you something, if people change is because they want to change.

In my opinion to think that to be happy we need someone to our side, is a misconception, I think by that thought there are many people that when they happen to be widows their world comes down to them. (Although good ... are speculations mine)

Without nothing more to add I wish you the best. And that in the end if you are looking for your true love... you find it!