My Second Love

I loved everything about you. Your intelligent gaze, your kind smile, and the way you walked with a hint of certainty of the future. You were tall for me at that time. And when you towered over me and looked straight into my eyes, you pressed mountains of load onto my heart. It was a good load. I loved it. I did not know what to do with the load, with the pressure, with passion that you struck me with. I did not know how to take it off so I held onto it as if holding onto a sacred treasure that I revisited every time I thought of you.

I loved you with my thoughts, my soul, and with passion I myself was surprised I had.

But the sad story is this.

I lied to you.

My first love consumed me fully and lead me through the oceans.

And you were my second.

And my first…my first love were my dreams, and aspirations. And I was enchanted with the uncertainties of the future, with the possibilities of life, and the sweetness of adventure.

You see… Adventure is my air, my purpose, my reason I get up in the mornings. Without it I would suffocate.

But you… you are a treasure, a pound of gold, a hidden gem that never changes its form. To find you — is to find constancy, and to be forever attached to it.

But constancy has never been in my DNA, and certainty has never been the way I live, and never will be.

And that made all the difference — my choice. I chose my first love.