how i decide to crack the lottery process, it was a fight of 5 years research, that i fail, but so close...

hi folks,
for the presenration, i'm a highly graduate in technologic branch of university, and i have a grade under a doctorant.
All my life, since my little age, i knew that one day i will not be able to avoid this ultim fight:
crack the lottery process
i'm not inspired today,
but i promise i'll continue early
thank you