How to become a better listener

Some quick tips on becoming a better listener.

Why would you want to become a better listener?

Becoming a better listener can help you greatly in your personal and business relationships.

It can also help you help others. Just listening can go a long way to helping people solve their own problems.

The No. 1 thing not to do.

Don't start with advice. The best way to start is to assume that the person you're listening to has already thought of the same solutions you have. Also, there might be many reasons that the person cannot take a simple action to solve the problem.

The best questions to ask when listening are open questions for e.g. Can you tell me more about that?

Listen to understand.

Show the person you're speaking to that you're listening to them by reflecting what they say back to them in a different way.

For e.g. someone tells you they're mad at their mother. You could let them know it sounds like their mother is really frustrating them at the moment.

Be empathic.

For e.g. someone says they hurt their back. You can respond by saying that it must be really hard to get things done with a sore back.

Encourage.

If someone tells you some good news or an achievement of their's, let them know you're happy for their news or that you think they've done well.

You can also let the person know you get what they're saying, then rephrase what they said to let them know you understand .

For e.g. someone tells you how hard it is without a babysitter. You could rephrase by pointing out what you're hearing is that a babysitter would really help right now.

These are just some of the tips. It takes practice to listen and respond appropriately but it is well worth it to make the people in your life feel heard and validated.