The Busiest 5 year old I Know 📝👧🏻
What do you do when you live in a country that is oversaturated with professionals? How do you make sure your child will have the chance to stand out in the future as they join the work force?
This is the story of my favorite student, Sunny.
Sunny was only 5 years old, but she already had a busier schedule than most people that I know.
Sunny lives in South Korea, where the English education market is huge. Knowledge of English is a must for anyone who wants to be successful. So, her parents enrolled in an all English Pre-K academy. Every day during the week she went to school to study English from 9 am until 2 pm. When she first began our classes, she could not write. Not even her name. She didn't know how to hold a pencil either. But Sunny was a quick learner and she always showed genuine excitement every time we studied a new topic.
Eventually, our school started offering "after school" programs on top of regular classes, so Sunny's mother signed her up for those too. So now her school day would end at 4 pm instead.
Sunny used to cry every afternoon because she was "so tired" and just wanted to go home. Instead of focusing on teaching, her after school teacher had to console her for 2 hours. But eventually, as kids do, she adapted and her busy schedule became the norm.
And maybe this is normal, even in your country. But the rest of the story is where I, personally, would draw a line.
On Mondays and Thursdays, Sunny's mom decided to sign her up for piano classes. So after she finished our school at 4 pm, Sunny would take a shuttle bus to the piano school. There, she would diligently (for a 5 year old) learn to play the piano. She would arrive home around 7 pm. Her mother would be home, but her father would still be working late into the night, as most Korean males must. After dinner, Sunny would do her homework from our English school and then go to bed.
Tuesdays and Fridays were Taekwondo days. Just like before, Sunny had to take a shuttle bus to a new school where the taekwondo classes were being held. These were her favorite days. She enjoyed taekwondo classes because she had the chance to play with friends while running around as all kids should. But she would arrive home around 7 exhausted. Sunny usually didn't do her homework on tuesdays. Her mother asked us to "please understand. She is tired." I bet.
What about Wednesdays? These were the worst. Sunny took swimming classes on Wednesdays and she absolutely hated them. Getting her to leave my classroom at 4 pm was always a struggle. She would cry her eyes out and hang on to me for dear life. I don't know what it was about swimming class that she hated so much. She said she didn't like the swimming teacher and the kids in that class. Regardless she was forced to go. Eventually her mother became tired of Sunny's constant complaining and put her in an art class instead.
And what about the weekend? Well, Sunny's parent's would leave her with her grandparents most weekends.
So, what time does that leave Sunny to bond with her mother and father? Remember, Sunny's family is rich. So her father would plan a 2 week vacation every few months to a foreign country. That's how they would bond as a family. During those two weeks, she would miss (and never get the chance to make-up) all of her lessons. But her parents would still complain about her progress at the end of the year.
Here's the real problem. I didn't have just one Sunny in my class. All 20 of my students were a Sunny. For some, it was their first year starting school. None of this schooling is required by the government. All of it is privatised and sold to parents as a way for their child to gain an advantage in the future. It's all about competition in Korea. For a lucky few, this was their first year starting their academy life. For the rest, they had been at it since the age of 3.
I've taught all ages of kids in Korea, and their academy lifestyle after school just gets worse the older they get.
What time do these kids have just to be kids? And in the end, was it all really worth it? Congratulations, all of your efforts have landed you a high paying job that forces you to work from dawn until 10 PM everyday, even weekends. But at least you can take a fancy 2 week vacation with your family every now and then.
Many years ago, my family hosted a few Korean exchange students. They also came from wealthy families and had similar crammed schedules.
And it does get worse the older they get! I remember one of them talking about how in Korea, they would get up at 5AM so they could catch the train in time to get to school. Then after school go to a tutoring school, and then the catch the train again and be home by dark. Basically they lived at school and slept at home. At the time I thought it was fascinating because it was so different than what I knew about life, but looking back, it's a pretty crazy schedule, especially for kids.
I do have to say though, all that craziness seems to have been worth it because they are doing pretty well for themselves now and seem to be well adjusted adults.
This should have way more votes. Great illustrations! I really felt a natural flow to the writing, You made me feel for Sunny and empathize with her plight. Kids just don't get to be kids anymore it seems these days. lol I was totally this kid crying all the time over the next stupid thing teachers would throw me into. It totally made me revert inward the moment I had a chance for myself. It gave me social anxiety like crazy and I became a very high strung child.
Wlsghwjd, I was amazed by your in-depth story about children in Korea. I can relate to the pressure these kids go through. Asian families place high expectations on children in education because it is valued above most things. I was fortunate that I had a more bearable schedule. My parents had placed me in many activities but not to the point where I couldn't enjoy life. It was more of a way to give me a chance to try different things in order to be more balanced. They wanted me to be educated so that in case of a divorce, I would be able to stand on my own two feet, being a female. Unfortunately more and more pressure is being placed on these poor children who don't have the ability to enjoy being young. You wrote a fantastic article and I commend you. I am sorry that I missed some of your posts. I had you on a vote robot so I could be alerted to when you posted but unfortunately I must have put a wrong letter in your name. I'm glad I took the time to check out your blog tonight. That is how I was able to find this excellent post of yours. I've made my corrections to the voting program so hopefully I won't miss out again. I really loved your comic strip and thought you just took a break. I look forward to more of your work!......Cabbagepatch
I can't believe the amount children have to do at school and get graded for it! Crazy. My 5 year old has learnt more than I did when I was 7. Great post
Follow @ch00fy
thats so true....
Terribly sad story. I just hate these Tiger Moms that ruin their kids' lives. The worst part is the fact that, as you say, kids adapt and it becomes the norm. For the rest of their lives.
This is so sad, I agree that children should learn to read write and do maths but please let them be children first. They need to know how it feels to plaly and enjoy life as later on there will not be time for it. All kids should be aloud to be kids.
Miss your posts - hope you are doing well.
Interesting
I will follow you to see your future posts! +UP
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