I need to get back into this. I can't just sit here.

in #life7 years ago (edited)

It's been a week since Mom passed. It doesn't feel like it at all.
I can't say that anything has been on any level of interest for me since then. I'm kind of surprised I'm writing this right now, in fact.

But I have to get back into this.

I can't just let it all go to nothing. Not just blogging, but my world around me in general.
It's weird now, though. After you lose both parents, even if you've long been an adult and established, the world just feels...I don't know...harsher. More raw, like the gloves just came off.

Image Source

When you're a kid, your parents are your security bubble.
They're your shield from the world.

When you grow up, that concept still exists in your mind, so when they're suddenly gone it feels like that shield goes with them. I didn't feel that until I lost the only parent I had left.

Now I'm the shield.

So in order to be a good one, I need to get the hell out of this funk. I need to get back in the swing of things and resume my usual daily routine. Not to forget, but to move on. I probably won't ever be done grieving, but that doesn't mean I need to give up. It doesn't mean I'll never be happy. It doesn't mean I loved them any less. It means that although we may have meant the world to a few close people, we are ultimately insignificant to the universe at large. With or without us, it doesn't slow down. It all goes on, and so must we.

So, after the dust settles in the next few days, expect to see me back to my usual self, writing and reading.
You should begin seeing all my daily projects and my upvotes on other people's posts slowly trickle back to life as I continue to put all the pieces of life back together, and perhaps the mend will be better than how it was originally.

  • The Daily Polaroid
  • The Daily 35mm Film Photo
  • The Daily Elephant
  • The Daily Panoramic
  • The Daily Party Pic Album
  • The Daily Digital Wet Plate Photo (this wasn't daily before, but it will be now)

Thank you all for the support for the past couple of weeks, and I'll see you on the inside.



Sort:  

I'm sorry for your loss, bro. Big hugs!

The healing process is a bit different for all of us. And it's affected by our perspective of the world as well as our relationship with the loved one.

Dad died young, at 53. It felt like suddenly I was the man, and I wasn't ready. I was just a kid (29). He was such a rock - solid, unwavering and firm. I took him for granted back then, and even resented him. Now, each year I miss him more, and wish I had that rock to lean on at times.
It doesn't go away. It just matures. After 23 years without him, I think I love and miss him more than ever. But the raw pain isn't there now. Instead, it's a wistfulness along with a desire to honor him in who I am and in my remembrance of him.

Our legacies live on in our progeny and the lives we touch. Who is blessed today because of who my parents are/were? Who will my kids bless? May the blessing never end.

Your mama had much to be proud of. We're blessed by her for knowing you.

This is deeper than it seems on the surface, my condolences.

@winstonwolfe so sorry for the loss. I'm coming up on the 3 year anniversary of losing my daughter. It never get's easier my friend, but knowing that they are looking down over us all and reflecting back on the time spent with them; short lived or a lifetime, will bring a bit of a smile to you as the days past. Stay strong, lean on others for comfort and support and continue to cherish their life!

Sorry to hear about the loss of your daughter. I can't imagine what that must be like. While it's painful to lose my parents, I can't help but think it wouldn't come close what it's like to lose a child.

Thank you for the kinds words man. The saying that "no parent should bury a child" is true, but time does heal. As strong as she was I feel that my duty for her legacy is to help encourage those that suffer losses similar to mine. I will be honest and say that time does truly heal and how and what you do with that time is what will ultimately decide on the power of the healing process. Always available my friend.

Sorry for your loss. Both my parents are still alive thank God but thinking about them getting weaker & older makes me sad enough. Have you heard "Stop This Train" by John Mayer. He sings about losing his parents & it makes me cry every time. Probably not what you'll be wanting to listen to but it's a brilliant song & words.

this is a sad part of your life losing the person who bring you in this life who care about you all this years is not easy but this is the cercle of life .and you should do your duty in this life.

A loss is a loss, it doesn't change just because we became adults. The space they occupy in our hearts remain. We love them just the same. They are watching us and won't leave till we're ok.

So sorry for your loss.

So sorry for your loss

Sorry for your loss...I know losing grandparents is rough, so I can only imagine how difficult it is to lose a parent. I always enjoy your posts, but what you're dealing with is way more important. Take all the time you need to focus on yourself, Man! Thoughts and prayers in your direction!!

I am so sorry for your loss. As a parent, grandmother and great grandmother I think of memories of my parents everyday and all I can do for them now is to honor them by living the best and happiest life I can.
All the best to you and yours!

Coin Marketplace

STEEM 0.17
TRX 0.15
JST 0.028
BTC 56769.00
ETH 2325.34
USDT 1.00
SBD 2.36