I may have an opportunity to learn who my birth mother is.
For those who may recall, I recently lost my mother to cancer. This is the woman who raised me from the age of 7 days; this is who I have and will always call "Mom".
But she was not my biological mother.
For my whole life I've known I was adopted, but I've never known who my birth parents are. I was given small gifts that my birth mother made sure my new parents would give to me when I became older. A ring, some books about Jesus, and a letter. There was also a document sent to my parents by the case workers who handled by adoption which described the heritage and religious orientation and physical appearance of my mother, as well as the physical appearance of my biological father. But no names, no identifying information whatsoever.
In the letter, she told me she wanted me to be in a family with 2 loving parents. This combined with the lack of information about my father led me to believe that she would've been a single mother, perhaps very young. Nevertheless, any ideas I surmise from the little clues I've been given amount to nothing more than speculation.
But I've learned in just the past few hours that a law is about to be enacted on January 1st in my state which will grant access to adoptees to file for a copy of their original birth certificates with their birth parent(s) name(s) on them.
With the current law in the state of Missouri, the birth certificate an adoptee receives is altered to include the names of the adopted parents and to provide confidentiality to the birth parent(s). With this new law, an adoptee can file for their original certificate for a $15 fee when they turn 18. The birth parents can have their information redacted to retain confidentiality, so if that's what my parents want after 38 years then it's possible that I could get a copy that has the info I'm looking for completely blacked out if they happen to beat me to the punch in filing.
It's still worth a shot, and the $15 fee.
My sister is in the same boat I am. She has talked to me on several occasions about how she's considered starting her own search. But with this new change, it may be as easy as mailing in a form.
I've already filled mine out. Just need to send it in.
Look after your heart, mate.
Losing a mum and gaining another real quick could make for quite an intense emotional roller coaster.
It's okay. There's the woman who gave me life, then there's Mom. I've had my whole life to understand the difference.
Hmm.. strong words you have there:
Losing a loved one could be really painful, its like a part of one been taken away, I miss my deceased father also. I am happy you are over it now. Stronger you, I pray.
Her death was only 3 weeks ago. I'm certainly not over it. One of the last things my mom told me before she died was that she was sorry she didn't know who my birth mother was. She wanted me to find out. Now I have that chance.
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we are grateful to be born and raised by biological parents. hopefully your story can be a change for future government regulation.
Wow. It's amazing that after all this time you may be given a chance to meet her.
I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is one of my biggest fears. Words mean little, but for whatever a positive vibe might be worth, I'll shoot one your way.
Wow. It's amazing that after all this time you may be given a chance to meet her.
I'm sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is one of my biggest fears. Words mean little, but for whatever a positive vibe might be worth, I'll shoot one your way.
I am so soorry for your loss. For sure she was a brilliant human and a fantastic mother to raise you as her own child.
Listen to your heart. I can imagine that all is not easy for you right now.
Breathtaking, even for a stranger who read you story...!
I can't even suppose what you feel, this is a big moment in someone's life and I only wish you the best...
Be strong, kind and forgiving...
Live gave you love and support and only love can heal us every wound...
Don't forget you are never alone...
:)
Good luck with your search! Keep us updated when you feel it is appropriate!!
Send you all my positive vibes in this moment and I truly wish you will find your peace and love along the path you decide to take.
I hope you find her. Good or bad, it is always good to know who brought us to this world.