Getting your priorities right

in #life6 years ago (edited)

I was relaxing on the couch, one saturday morning after my usual exercise when my phone rang. It was David's number that came in via whatsApp audio call.

"Good afternoon sir, David greeted excitedly, on the phone. Good morning David, we are in the morning here. How are you doing? How is mum and dad? It's been a while I heard from them. They are fine, he answered ecstatically. David, you are sounding so bright, I asked?"
"Uncle, I made all my papers. I cleared my WAEC and had 280 in JAMB said David. Thank you for not giving up on me, thank you for the encouragement, I have sent copies of my results to your mail, David said joyously. Congratulations, David!!! I must say, I am really impressed and proud of you. Thank you Uncle, he said. Now, I know how important priorities are and I am ready to get them right, henceforth. I can't wait to be in the university."

David is my cousin, whom my parents adopted when he was 7 years old, after he lost his mum during the birth of her second son. His father released him to my parents, because he knew they could help raise him well. He continued his primary education in a private school and has always been a good, brilliant, intelligent and well-behaved student until when he got to senior class and he started leaving his academic work unattended to.

He started neglecting his academic work, and would be on the phone or screen from morning till night changing from one channel to the other, and moving from one social media applications to the other while neglecting his primary responsibilities. I really could not understand what came over him then.

Last year, my mother called to tell me about how David had failed his first attempt of the West African Senior School Certificate Examination(WASSCE). I was a bit disappointed.

I tried to encourage him not to give up, as failure is not the end of life. I admonished him to shun all forms of distractions and get his priorities right towards the coming year. Then, I told him I was going to mail him a write-up, he should download, print it out and paste it on the wall or perhaps, put it by his bed side and never should a day pass without he, meditating on them. The article I tagged, " getting your priorities right".

If everything is a priority, then nothing is. The things we focus on are the things we get. Good or bad. With priorities, you can get what you want, without them, hopefully, it comes together by chance. Priority is when we focus on something, consciously and subconsciously, moving towards it by developing behaviours to get there.

How to get them straight

1. Make a list of what you want- Now is the time to determine all the things you want to do, tomorrow or next year. Be broad!

2. Pick two things on the list-The very most important thing to you, and the most important thing on the list, you can execute within a month or two or within six months. The more goals you achieve, the more confidence you build to achieve bigger goals.

3. Give a separate list of the things you have to do- This is a reality check, which must be done. Drawing your timetable, reading your books, Solving questions, attending classes, you know better than I do, just ensure you dot your 'i' and cross your 't'.

4. Give your leisure time to your priorities first. Priority is ranking the major things above the minor things in your life. When you give your time to the minor things in your life, then it is not priority

5. Keep grinding- When you accomplish a goal, celebrate and then replace it with the next one

6. Once or twice a week, review both your priorities and your reality check list. Think about your priorities, you have a list of them. The important and more difficult thing is to keep it up. If you want to build a habit, keep it up everyday.

Below the article I sent to David, I wrote;

"Make a list of what you want to achieve in the forth coming examination with the grades you intend to have. Send me a copy and paste a copy on your wall."

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Could it be that he hasn't dealt with the loss of his mother to a degree that would've been necessary? Not only did he lose his mother but his father, too, in the sense that his father relinquished his parental rights and let your parents adopt him. Those are some huge issues to deal with. You mentioned that he was a brilliant and a conscientious student for the longest time until now. Why has he dropped the ball like that? Has anyone tried to talk to him about what might be bothering him? What kind of introspective ability does your cousin/adopted brother have? Is he showing signs of depression? A sense of meaninglessness causing him to lose interest in his life? What's going on? He doesn't sound lazy. Talk to him. Don't just have him plaster his walls with posters with pep talk on them.

Thank you for the points you have raised. This is something I tried to do in my little own way. I also know he is being guided properly and got support from a lot of corners.

You have really helped the ypung man. I'm sure this time he will really do better in his exams. You are a huge source of motivation to him. Good job.

Thanks @gloglo. Have a great month.

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