Doc Knows Best
Chester opened his lunchbox for the fourth time, but shut it quickly. "So, I was at the doctor's last Tuesday, and he tells me I've got a tapeworm in my gut somewhere, eating my lunch."
Hank groaned, and Chester looked at him sadly. "Can you imagine? So here's what he tells me, the doc. He says for me to go home, he does."
Chester shook his head, and then finally went on. "The doc, he tells me, that to get rid of this worm, that I need to cram a hard-boiled egg in my ass, and then I need to cram a lemon cookie in there. The doc says to do this every day for a week, and then come back and see him."
Hank had stopped nodding. "You put a hard boiled egg, then a lemon cookie, up your own ass, every day for a week? What kind of..."
Chester nodded solemnly. "I know. It didn't sound right to me either, but so anyways, I goes home and I follow the docs instructions, 'cause what the hell do I know? First a hard boiled egg, and then a lemon cookie, every day for a week. In the ass."
Hank made a little 'tsk' sound and stared at the floor as Chester continued.
"So I goes back to the doc yesterday, bein' one week later, and he asks me right away, did I cram the hard-boiled egg, and did I follow that with the lemon cookie. I tells him, hell yes but I'm still not feeling too hot. So the doc, he tells me, 'drop your pants.' Seeing how he's a doctor and all, I did, and he has me laying on that stainless-steel workbench, and he picks up a little silver hammer from out of a drawer."
Hank just blinked as Chester paused, but then went on. "Then the doc, he takes a hard-boiled egg, and jams it inside of me... it weren't nice how he did it, but maybe his chicken lays bigger eggs than mine. Anyways, he's sitting there in his doctor coat with the doctor hammer in his hand there, and he just sits there."
Chester fidgeted for a second, then he sighed. "So after the doc jams a hard-boiled egg up my ass, he just sits there with that little hammer, and all of a sudden that tapeworm pops his head out of me, and looks around at us both, it does, and this tapeworm it yells "HEY! WHERE'S MY GODDAMN LEMON COOKIE?" Instead of answering, the doc hits the little bastard with the silver hammer, bam. No more tapeworm."
adapted from a joke I heard once-- I always remember the good ones. Photo thanks to Pixabay. Happy Saturday Night
hahaha.. "it weren't nice how he did it, but maybe his chicken lays bigger eggs than mine."
I hope I dont remember this joke when eating eggs.
Yeah I don't really eat eggs anymore, or lemon cookies.
I cringed, but I laughed. haha,
What is wrong with you?
It's Saturday night, and that's my only excuse for securing this joke forever in the blockchain this fine evening!
That's a funny one. I needed a laugh. Thanks LOL so much @therealpaul
I knew there must be a good reason to post it, glad it helped!
Made me laugh.
I accomplished my goal.
Its been a long time since i've heard from this tape worm.
Yeah I really should have forgotten this joke by now, but no such luck.
WTF, dude. When I started to read, I thought it was something serious.
Why do you even think about this stuff?
Bloody tapeworms thirsty of lemon cookies!!!
haha well it's an old joke that I somehow remember, but I really don't remember jokes very well. It is sick, the few jokes that I know, this is one of my favorites.
Haha it really funny. You are fantastic to describe very seriously.Thanks and have a good night.
Glad you enjoyed, it was a bit different. I heard it told as a joke, long ago. Good morning!
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how are you doing, thank you for sharing a story of your life, hope you are always successful yes, i support you and i will restem, hope you can enjoy my post @therealpaul
You're going to love my knock-knock jokes post then.
I will always be on your blog and I will always support you, because I want to be like you succeed, how are you today?
Lunch box is looking dramatic 😂 eggs are looking so hygienic amd sanitized thanks for this post @therealpaul
Don't know if you read it, but by not upvoting, you'll get no curation rewards, and what's more, your 0.010 self upvote on your own comment won't show up as rewards either, it's too small, and will be dusted away unless it's at least 0.020 at payout time. I just thought you might like to know, the penny self-vote is a wasted vote, when you could use that same vote to curate posts that you want to comment on. To comment without upvoting the post is something that I would never intentionally do, because it's considered to be bad manners. Save your votes for curation and you might see some rewards come in. If you read the post, and still want to comment on it, you might see some rewards that way too.