Today i woke up feeling something

This morning i woke up late and i noticed something weird, i felt something in my chin, something cold, it was a tear, i woke up crying, at first look i thought that it was normal, but then i think about it and it's not something that happens to me with regularity, so i start looking in my memory, and i found something. I feel a lot of sad things, i mean, i have tons of weird ass moments in my mind, moments with people i love and i can't see them now (almost for a very long time), and when i think about it, well, i start crying again, maybe some of you can say that i'm overeacting to this, but actually i'm fucked up with this things, i miss a lot of people, they are my family, and i can't be with them, so i'm frustrated, i'm a student, and the university, the people, the foof, the drinks, the books, everything is boring to me right now, i feel weird.

Even right now, all i do is smoke cigarretes while i'm writing about my feelings listening to sad music, i have to go to the college right now, but i don't want to, i just want to see my gf, i want tu hug her and fall to sleep next to her, but i can't she's a student to, and i don't want her to loss her classes just because i'm feeling sad, i don't know what i'm feeling, but i don't like this, the worst part is, that is not the first time i feel like this, and i think i'm getting used to this.