Quitting my day job to change the world | Chapter 2: The mindset to endure (part 2/3)

ricardocastilho (47)in #life • 7 years ago (edited)

In the first post of this series I’ve talked about the reasons made me decide to leave my job and devote myself to create a positive impact on the world. However, I know that the path will be long and difficult. To prevail it’s essential to cultivate a mindset that allows to overcome the (many) difficulties that will arise. This is the second of three posts on the subject. Previously I discussed the importance of seeing reality for what it is.Today I will talk about the expectations of others and the impact they have in our actions.

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Part 2 - Dealing with the expectations of others

When we start something new, especially when it goes against what is "normal", we are often bombarded with negative reviews by people around us. This is mainly because, consciously or not, everyone tends to create certain expectations of others that don’t want to see defrauded. A father expects his daughter to marry a man of the same ethnicity, or a wife who expects her husband keep your job to have financial stability, are some examples of these expectations that can discourage and make us forfeit from our goals. This is especially true if they come from someone near and / or has influence on us.

To deal with the expectations of others it is vital that we take responsibility for our actions. If we approach our project impulsively, without thinking in the consequences of our actions, most likely, we will not achieve the desired results. When this happens, and in face of failure, it is very easy to convince ourselves that others are right to expect us to do something different. The same is true if, in the context of our project, we give too much power of decision to third parties. We became dependent on the opinions of others and value them above our own. This seriously affects our critical thinking and amplifies the influence that expectations have over us. If, on other hand, we conduct our project in a more rational, independent and realistic manner, we get more positive results and doubt less of ourselves.

When faced with the expectations of others, it may be useful trying to understand if they know exactly what are the goals and intentions that made us take a different direction. Often these expectations arise as an attempt to protect us from the unknown, leading us to follow the same path as themselves or one that they know to be safe. In such situations, an honest and open conversation, in which we explain in detail our own intent and motivations, whilst trying to understand the reason of the expectations, can be very positive and even soothing for both parties.

It is essential to think for ourselves and take responsibility for the consequences of our actions . If we do, we will depend less and less of others' opinions and start justifying only toward ourselves. But this does not mean at all, that we should ignore the advice of those around us. The ideas and opinions of others can pose a tremendous contribution to our project, and to our life in general. It is our duty to listen to them, in an unbiased way, and adopt those that we consider most beneficial for our goals.

Picture 1: Source

Thanks for reading

This is the second post in a series that describes my journey to quit my day job and set up an organization with the aim to make a positive impact on world. In this post described the mindset that I'm adopting to take this path. The next posts, after completing this topic, will talk about the practical approach that I will implement.

What is your opinion?

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by the expectations and opinions of others? They have given up any project or decision important for not being well accepted by your family and friends? How do you deal with such situations?