Reflecting in a storm

Today I was reflecting on a traumatic event that I recently experienced, and I had to express how happy I am currently. I know that sounds like a disconnect. Trauma = happy. To restate, I am not happy that I went through the trauma, but rather, I am happy with the way it turned out. In fact, I want to use the word dayenu. It’s a Hebraic word to mean “it would have been enough”, “it would have been sufficient”, or “it would have sufficed”. 

That is where I am. My son fell from a 3rd story window. When I made it down the stairs, he was still, eyes wide open, mouth gaping, and there was blood. In no uncertain terms, I thought he was dead. As we were on the phone with 911, he snapped out of the shock, and started screaming. This was the first moment of dayenu. Despite the odds, he lived. 

Then he started squirming, and my jaw dropped. Not only was he alive, but he could move. As far as injuries go, I knew he had them but at that moment I could see that his head had no major visible injuries. Not that I was not still panicked, and at that moment, I was just focused on providing enough information for the ambulance to arrive to us. 

Fast forward a bit. We’re at the hospital and he is responding with words. Words and it has not even been an hour. People were checking various things as I was talking to him to help try to calm him down, and the medical personnel were trying to assess the extent of the damage. 

You might be like ‘you’re drifting from the dayenu point’, and you’re kind of right. I want to paint this picture of ‘go go go’, high energy, and one very loud distraught child as I stood with tears streaming from my eyes. The Children’s Hospital did a great job at handling his injuries, checking to make sure I was OK, and even try to help the siblings who were there for the whole thing. There is my big point of the scene. We were not at any hospital, but one who handled the whole situation better than I could have imagined.  

The day moved to the next, and outpouring of support started to come in. As people found out what happened, they began taking action. Of the 6 days we were there, I only had to buy a couple of meals. This is a huge deal. I did not have to eat cafeteria food either. There were homecooked things as well as good takeout. Friends and some family came to the hospital to visit, and they took care of the siblings while I stayed in the hospital. They were concerned for my tiny-human, but also of how I was holding up. 

During the stay, there were services to encourage my tiny human to play and have fun. Things he could do in the bed and out of bed. When you spend so much time in one room, that is a big deal and it helped us pass the time as his body healed. Then there was my job telling me to take as much time as I needed. My brain was mush as I was entirely focused on my tiny human’s recovery, and that was one less concern to weigh on me. There was no hounding, no threatening on my job, and my co-workers stepped up to fill in the gap. 

(Could not resist)

Moving forward a bit more, my tiny human damaged his hand and has a concussion. Ya’ll, that is not a lot of damage for the fall onto cement from that distance. By the time we left he was joking, playing, and wanting to get up and go. I am still thanking God for how well he is doing physically, emotionally, and mentally.  

I forgot to mention, this event occurred just after I moved. Literally I had less than 24 hours in that place with my tiny human, and after going home, my friends bought groceries for me. Then helped me get a few things situated in the new place so help things move along. 

With the outline of how things went down, I think you can see why I am thankful, but what about the ‘it would have been enough’ part?  If He had just let my child live and not have use of every limb - dayenu. If He had given us competent doctors and not an entire hospital geared for children - dayenu. Basically, not only did we receive the minimum that we should be thankful for, but I feel like it was above and beyond. Through the trauma we were blessed, and for that I am thankful. That was my reflection. 

You may think I am bragging, but that is not the case. Instead, as I sit with my tiny humans getting on my nerves, and surgery still lying ahead, this reflection has encouraged me. I would urge everyone to think on things lately in your own lives. Maybe you’ll find your own “dayenu” moments where gruel would have been enough, but you were pleasantly surprised to receive a 3-course-meal. 

((Photos are found here: Happy fingers, high five, and Fluttershy))