Retired early to Florida in 2014, knowing my wife’s heart condition would progress further. Indeed, from 65-70 years old her symptoms followed the sequence of events exactly as the doctors predicted. By 2022, her cardiologist was ready to schedule open heart surgery as he was installing a pacemaker-defibrillator combo.
Meanwhile, my mom needed help as her dementia became more evident. I left Florida to care for my mom (only child), and my wife remained at our condo in Florida, with lots of neighbors around.
While staying with mom in another state, I got a call from neighbors about my wife. She had a stroke and laid there for 6-8 hours before being discovered.
Eventually both my mom and my wife were in hospice simultaneously. My stepdaughter took primary responsibility for her mom, and my stepson contributed in many important ways.
My mother died 11/27/2023 and my wife died 02/29/2024. Both graves are side by side and that is done.
It’s hard with both occurring together in such a short time, but on the other hand a tremendous amount of emotional stress can be channeled into an unlikely opportunity: I have outlived my spouse while still healthy, my mother’s estate is about to be settled which will give me financial reserves, and for the first time in my life…I’m truly free!!!
With this caviat: I’m slave to any dog or dogs that befriend me. I cannot truly be happy without a dog of my own. I do take plenty of time between dogs to grieve their deaths and I’m careful to adopt another. It’s like adopting a child.